Page 13 of Velvet and Valor
The dark-haired damsel isn’t having any of that. She jams her elbow backward right into his temple. The man flops back into his seat holding his head, the car swerving wildly as he lets her go.
Being grabbed gives the damsel a bolt of courage. She reaches out and clasps my hand. My legs work overtime,pumping the clutch, the gas, and working the wheel while I match speed with the limo.
“Just stick your leg in the window!” I shout. “Come on, we don’t have all?—”
She shoves her foot through the window. I get a glimpse of a shapely leg right before her Louis Vuitton high-heeled shoe comes down…right on my crotch.
“Jesus Christ!” I seethe through clenched teeth. “Hurry up!”
We hit a patch of rough pavement. The limo veers to its left, peeling away. The damsel screams as the limo is pulled literally out from under her. My arm trembles as I struggle to hold most of her body weight while she dangles from my window.
At last, she thrusts her other foot in the car. I swerve to avoid the limo, which is rushing up on our side.
“Hurry!” I shout.
Maybe I shouldn't have rushed her, because she wallops me in the jaw with a briefcase. Why the hell did she bring that? Is her hair dryer really that freaking important?
I shake off the pain and struggle to get control of the car. The woman loses her balance and falls right on top of me, basically straddling my lap.
My face is briefly enveloped by a heavenly softness as her chest squishes into me. I can’t believe I’m doing this, but I fight to escape the sublime embrace of her bosom so I can see to steer the fucking car. The buckle of her purse strap scratches a line on my collarbone but the tradeoff is worth it.
Believe me, I almost thought death would be a fair price to stay right where I was. Until that moment, she was just a VIP I needed to extract. A mission.
Now I realize this is a woman in my lap…and a damn fine one at that. All of this flashes through my mind in a nanosecond as I plant my chin on her shoulder and see a gun pointed my way.
The old guy in the backseat looks like I just woke him up from a nap and he’s pissed. A spot on his temple will likely swell into a nasty lump later. I can’t move my arms enough to steer away with this chick in my lap. So, I’ve got one option.
“Ramming speed,” I growl, slamming it into top gear and mashing the pedal to the floor. The Charger surges up and slams hard into the rear bumper of the limo.
The man sprawls hard across the seat. Without a rear window to contain him, he almost slides out onto the trunk.
In fact, the whole limo is looking rough. Without the roof, the undercarriage has to deal with additional strain. It probably won’t last much longer.
“I need you to move!” I snap, struggling to get the car under control without full use of my arms.
“I’m trying!” She squirms around on my lap, which has predictable results. “Oh my god, you’re disgusting!”
“It’s an autonomic nervous response!” I sputter. “Just get in the other seat already!”
She makes it over the center console and shifter and into the passenger seat. I don’t have to tell her to buckle up, which is good, because trouble looms ahead.
The construction has bunched up traffic for miles. Now, it’s downright stopped dead. There’s nowhere to go, because even the shoulder has been packed with motorists trying an easy cheat and only making things worse.
“What are you doing?” The lady’s voice is edged with worry. “Stop!”
“If I stop, they shoot,” I say, shaking my head. “Don’t worry, I know what I’m doing.”
“Oh, well, that just makes everything better,” she mutters.
“Hey, I’m a firm believer in?—”
I grab the handbrake and throw the wheel to the side, hard. The lead sled skids into a hard handbrake turn, leaving twinstreaks of black on the pavement and filling the air with the rich aroma of melted rubber.
The wheels billow white smoke as the car points in the opposite direction. We take off like a bolt of lightning, going the wrong way down the highway.
“Manifestation,” I say, finishing my earlier statement.
“I’m dead,” she says, laughing. “I’ve been rescued by a maniac. I’d have been better off staying with the bad guy fromPhantasm.”
