Page 153 of The Governess of My Heart
“We had an argument, more than an argument that night, but I never thought she could do something like that.”
“You do not make any sense. You say she was not capable of such an act, but if she did it, you were the reason.”
“Yes!”
“How?”
“Because I betrayed her trust.”
“Did you have an affair with Lord Ashton?” Elizabeth asked without thought.
“Good Heavens, No!”
“Then?” Elizabeth asked while Lady Isabella remained silent.
“I know you do not want to share anything with me, but please trust me. I do not want to force these details out of you, but I have no choice except to reveal this to your husband and Lady Martha now. Please allow me to take you to them.”
“I cannot.”
“I know you have no regard for me, but if you share it with me, I can at least try to help. You are mistaken if you assume that I would keep this between ourselves. I have kept so many things to myself since I came here, and I am not willing to make the same mistake again.”
“Do you really believe I have no regard for you?” Lady Isabella asked Elizabeth.
“Is that not quite clear? You have hated me since the moment we were introduced.”
“I did, at first, because I saw in you everything I saw in Sophia. Your confidence, intelligence, and affection for the children reminded me of the friend I had lost and, according tothe blackmailer, the one I killed. I never hated you; I was envious that you gained everyone’s affection and respect here, which I never could.”
Elizabeth looked at her in shock.
“Elizabeth, I am so tired. I have tried in vain to be brave, to not succumb to my failings, but all my resolve evaporated today. I have tangled myself in a web I can never escape.”
“You act as though there is no way out of your problem. But there is, we can help you. This family cannot stand another loss, another secret. Now tell me, what happened that night? Why was Lady Sophia angry with you?”
Lady Isabella looked at Elizabeth with a blank expression.
“The truth came to light.”
“What would that be?”
“That I was in love with Philip, even before he married Sophia. Sophia and I grew up together as the best of friends. We have been friends with the Ashton family since childhood, and our families were very close. I have loved Philip since I knew what the word love meant. But as years passed, I realized he never looked at me that way. The only woman in his heart was Sophia, and they got married. As much as I tried to forget him, I could not. I was guilty of being in his company, having to look at him as my friend’s husband, though in my heart, he was the only man I could ever love. They were so happy together and had two beautiful children. No matter how hard I tried, I could not keep myself away from them. My parents pressured me to get married, but I could not. Sophia often questioned why, and I had to lie to her. You must understand that I never meant to steal Philip from her; as much as I loved him, I valued my friendship with her more than anything in the world and could never do such a thing. But she was not naïve; I had no idea how she discovered my secret. She knew me well, and I think she soon realized the secret in my heart; she saw through my lies andfound the truth. That fateful night, she came to my room with my diary in her hand.”
Lady Isabella closed her eyes in pain as she relived the last time, she had seen her friend alive and her thoughts reverted to that fateful night.
…“Tell me, Isabella, what is this? Are you going to state that every word here was written by someone else?” Lady Sophia cried with rage.
“Why did you read this? How could you? This is something private.”
“What is my husband’s name doing in your diary then? Good heavens, how long have you loved him?”
“Please, Sophia, you must listen to me.”
“Listen to what? How long have you loved him?” she asked as she shook her friend.
“Answer me. I knew there was a reason why you rejected every proposal that came your way, even before I married Philip, and that means you loved him even before we fell in love. You were my friend; how could you do this to me? All these years, you have loved a man who is my everything and still stayed as my friend. Are you not ashamed of yourself? You have betrayed me in the worst possible way.”
“Yes, I have loved him for a long time, long before you both fell in love,” she replied with tears.
“And you chose to hide this from me? How could you?”
