Page 33 of Guys Can't Write Romance
The rest of the room erupted in laughter.
“That’s because someone put red towels in my wash,” Chad grumbled, shooting Daisy a glare.
“Must’ve been someone very organized and vengeful and exceptionally cute,” Daisy said with a grin.
“And psychotic.”
“Oh, you mean like someone who runs across a school playground with a bra on his head?”
“That was funny.”
“So are the clothes, Pretty in Pink.”
Chad groaned as chuckles spread through the group.
“Alright, everyone,” Mags called the meeting to order, though she was clearly fighting a smile. “Let’s get started with our critiques. Helen, why don’t you begin with Daisy’s pages?”
Helen adjusted her reading glasses. “Well, dear, the writing is lovely as always, but I’m concerned about Rick.”
Daisy sat up. “What about him?”
“Besides he sucks?” said Chad.
“Shut up, Pink Panther,” Daisy shot back. “What’s wrong with Rick, Helen?”
“He’s just so... oh, what’s the word I’m looking for?” said Helen.
“Flat,” Bernie offered.
“Yes, there’s that,” said Helen.
“Boring,” said Phil.
“That, too,” Helen nodded in agreement.
“Safe,” Ruth added.
“Exactly like every other male lead you’ve written,” Liv finished. “He’s like a cardboard cutout of a man. A very responsible cardboard cutout, but still.”
“He’s stable,” Daisy said. “He’s secure. He’s what every girl dreams of.”
“He put me to sleep by page three,” Chad cut in.
“Says the man in pink jeans.”
“Rick’s supposed to be a professional athlete,” Mags pointed out gently. “But he has all the personality of a tax return.”
“A very organized tax return,” Bernie added. “But nonetheless, he is difficult to root for.”
“Should’ve had the dinosaur eat him,” said Chad.
“Now there’s an idea,” said Bernie.
“You’re agreeing with Chad?” said Daisy.
“It needn’t be a dinosaur, but the story does need something to liven it up.”
“Told ya,” said Chad.
