Page 42 of Is This for Real?
“Yes, I mean . . .” I am not awake enough, and I can’t get the words out to say we should date for real. I shiver just thinking it. I am not functioning well enough to be treading in these dangerous waters. He is just staring at me. I feel a prickle of unease. I can’t tell what he’s thinking now. I take the coward’s route out. “What do you think?”
He shrugs and looks down. I shouldn’t have said no when he asked to kiss me. Or something happened with Callie last night and fake dating me isn’t necessary.
“We don’t have to decide it now,” he says.
“Yes, I can’t think of a breakup story right now. I mean, I can’t think of a reason why we’d break up,” I say. The heat of his thigh touching mine makes me check if there’s smoke.
“Too comfortable with each other? Boring? Not enough sizzle?” Rory looks at me. Actually, I’m feeling way too much sizzle right now. Rory is sitting too close. My heartbeat is accelerating. It doesn’t feel comfortable at all. Definitely not boring.
“I hope you don’t find me boring,” I say.
“Never.”
“We haven’t done nearly enough research for my book. We need to go on more dates. You don’t have any weddings of exes coming up, do you?”Is it too much to hope that Callie is about to marry herself off?
“No.”
“Too bad.”
Rory laughs wryly. “I’m rather relieved about that.”
“This brunch is enough of a substitute.”
“Especially if Jamie is there, unattached.” He leans back against the couch.
I should go for it, or at least hint at it. I should have prepared something. “It’s not that I’m not . . .”
The clanging of the spiral, iron stairs announces Zelda’s arrival.Yeah, so that was an awkward start.Too many double negatives as I tried to say “it’s not that I’m not interested in you.”
Zelda yawns as she arrives at the top of the stairs. “You guys need to look a little more rumpled, like you just rolled out of bed, although the unshaven look is good, Rory.”
He smiles. “That’s what I thought.” He puts his arm around me and rubs his unshaven cheek against mine. “How’s that feel?”
I squeal. “Rough.”
“It’s not that you’re not . . . what?” he asks.
Goldie jumps up on the couch, but when I pet her, she flicks her tail, annoyed.
Aargh, I just can’t.Baby steps.“It’s not that I’m not over Jamie. I am.”
“Hallelujah.” Zelda perches on the couch arm rest. “What’s your game plan?”
“Stick to the truth as much as possible,” I say. My life of deception is making my stomach queasy. And this is my sister. I should have told her. If she finds out, she might really give up on me, like I’m this lost cause who’s afraid to ever share secrets or emotions.
“We were able to pull it off on Thursday, and we’re best friends anyway, so it’s not that much of a stretch.” He pets Goldie, who purrs. Traitor.
“We need some non-verbal signals,” I say. “I wasn’t sure what you were trying to signal at the cocktail party. I thought your look was stay close, but I wasn’t sure.”
“You read it correctly,” Rory says.
“We need another one for help if the questioning gets too close, although Rory remembered the chin-stroking from college,” I say to Zelda.
We all stroke our chins and look intellectually serious. We were forced to develop a “rescue me” sign because of this one incredibly boring professor who cornered students. A student would stroke their chin and nod, and that was the signal for other students to rescue them.
“How could I forget? How about rubbing the back of your neck?” he asks.
“Good. Works for both of us.”
