Page 49 of Hell of a Mess
I was broken. But I wasn’t helpless. Although, that night, I had appeared that way. I was stronger than he realized.
“I’ll stop being difficult, and I’ll try to eat more. I won’t get in your way,” I said, my voice barely above a whisper. I was begging.
He stared at me for several seconds.
“You’re real damn hard to tell no,” he said in a husky voice. “It’s those eyes. Fucking lethal. Your momma must have been a beauty. That shit didn’t come from Mal.”
Was he saying he thought I was beautiful?
“He’s fighting me on this. Just so you know. You might have to tell him yourself. Mal doesn’t want you around me.”
Mal was getting on my nerves.
“I’m an adult.”
A crooked grin curled his lips. “Yeah, you are. I don’t need that reminder.”
We sat there in silence for a moment. I fantasized about burying my nose in his neck and breathing him in.
“You can’t look at me like that.”
My eyes snapped up from where I had been staring at his neck like a weirdo. “What?” I asked, unsure.
“Listen, sugar, I’m not one who denies himself what he wants. But you’re different. I can’t take you. It’s a first for me, and right now, it’s a struggle. What you’re wearing, your hard nipples poking through the satin—yeah, all I can think about is sinking my dick in you. And we can’t do that. So, don’t look at me like you want a taste.”
I wasn’t sure I was breathing—or that I could breathe. I was gaping at him though. I closed my mouth when I realized it.
“Told you I wasn’t a good man. Now, lay your sexy little ass down and go the fuck to sleep.”
I licked my lips that had suddenly gone dry and inhaled a shaky breath. The area between my legs had come alive in a way that was almost painful. Images of him doing what he’d just said played wildly in my head. I’d never had sex. I’d never been around a man long enough to have a relationship that led to sex. Arun hadn’t wanted sex from me. I was just…I was just his cover. The answer to his problem. But I had watched sex. I’d read about it. I had fantasized about it.
Now, I wanted it more than ever and with the man sitting beside me.
“Jesus, Lace, stop. I’m not completely sober, and my dick is hard. Cover yourself up and go to sleep so I can go jack off and get some relief.”
Did he mean masturbate? He was going to go do that?
Slowly, I slid back under the covers and lay down.
“Cover up all the skin. All the way to the neck, sugar,” he said, his eyes closed.
I started to and stopped. I…I wanted him to look. The area between my legs really wanted him to look.
When I finally closed my eyes, I was smiling. I knew the dreams I wanted, and I looked forward to them.
The sun wasn’t up yet, and I’d not dreamed at all. Had I even been to sleep? Yes, because I didn’t remember rolling over.
“Fuck.”
The low, deep sound had my eyes flying fully open. I’d not realized Luther was still here. There was an unfamiliar sound as the bed gently moved in a rhythm.
“Unbutton your top and roll on your back if you’re gonna listen,” he said in a gravelly voice.
Was he talking to me? He couldn’t be talking to me. He thought I was asleep.
“You didn’t cover up like I told you to, sugar,” he said. “And I’ve had to look at your cleavage and your round little ass in those shorts for two hours.”
Okay, he was talking to me…I thought.
