Page 43 of Kiss Me at Midnight
“I admit,” he told her. “I was worried about Rachel using clips of our hot tub singing. I’d rather not become a social media meme.”
“Like me?” Lily tensed. “I don’t think you’re a target. She respects you and loves you a little bit, too.” Lily couldn’t keep the bitterness from her tone. She was becoming proprietary where Jud was concerned. “And tomorrow when we break up, she’ll have her shot at you.” Lily snuggled deeper in his embrace, blaming it on the cold when in reality, she didn’t want the intimate moments with Jud to end. “How do you want to do it?”
Jud drew back, staring at her with raised brows.
“Oh, word choice. You know what I mean.” Lily’s cheeks heated anyway.
“I do. And I’d never pressure you to do something you aren’t ready for.”
Lily shoved her glasses into her hair and buried her face against his chest.
He lifted her chin and lowered her glasses ever-so-gently until his face came into focus. “Studying character is an actor’s job. Something happened to you after Rachel left you in that pop-up club. Something that makes you careful about the clothes you wear and the men you date. You can tell me. I’m here to listen.”
“Why do you want to know?” Lily sounded meak and wary. But that’s what life had made her.
“Because I want to know who you are. Not the person you project to the world, but the strong woman beneath the layers, the one with vulnerability in her eyes.”
“Oh.”
His arms came around her, drawing Lily more completely into the shelter of his embrace. “I’ll wait.”
Lily was certain that he would. She drew in a shaky breath. “I wanted to cry when she left. I was supposed to be the one protecting her, but then I had no one to protect, no one to be brave for.” No twin to do both.
“Of course, you’d be afraid. You were seventeen, alone in a cage with men disrespecting you.” He made it sound so simple.
He understood. Lily couldn’t bring herself to speak. She could only nod.
“When did it get worse?” His question was as patient and comforting as his embrace.
The words she’d never spoken tumbled out. “When someone opened my door.” Bodies, hands, hot breath and lewd suggestions. “I was dragged out and trapped in the crowd.” The lights had been pulsing in time to the music. It was impossible to make out faces, to humanize anyone touching her. “They ripped off my blouse.” The fabric, their nails. She had scratches all over her skin. “They would have torn me–”
Jud pressed her closer still, mangling her glasses. Not that she cared.
“–but the police showed up.” Not that Rachel had called them. They were there on a drug raid. She’d collapsed as the party-goers had run out the back.
“I want to beat the crap out of every one of them,” Jud whispered gruffly.
“That’s what the cop who took me home said, too.” Lily managed to work her head free and smile up at him. “They all scattered. It was so dark…I couldn’t have identified anyone…”
Jud stroked her hair. “There was no one to press charges against? No slimeball to face in court?”
She shook her head.
“No closure,” Jud murmured.
She shook her head again.
“And little progress forward,” he said softly. “No therapy? No support groups?”
“I have four sisters. I’ve never been the girl who over-shares. I’m okay.”
“You’re more than okay.” He surprised her by agreeing. “You are mighty fine. Mighty fine.” He traced her cheek with his finger. “And I’m honored that you shared your story with me.”
Lily blinked back unexpected tears. “Thank you for listening.”
They stared at each other in silence.
Lily forced out a laugh. “I’m not much good at deep, soul-searching stares that come before deep, soul-searching kisses.”
