Page 219 of Jagged Souls
“No!” I rasp. “Where’s Antonio?”
I need to see his body. I need to make sure he’s gone.
“He’s gone.”
“He might not be!”
“Your fire can’t be put out,” he says.
Normally, no. But I don’t have control of it anymore, and the ocean is such a vast amount of water…
“Where is he? I need to find him!” I turn my head, trying to spot him through the waves.
“Let him go, Micha,” he says, so much pain in his voice. “If he comes back, we’ll deal with it then, but for now let’s just go home.”
He tugs on my chin, and I let him pull my face towards his. As he looks at me, I feel so utterlyemptywhen I should be feeling safe and alive and full or hope. Or at least happy that the nightmare is over.
But I don’t.
Because I need to see his body. I need to cut off his head and rip out his heart and bury him in fucking cement inside a containment circle so I can know for sure he’s dead.
Otherwise, I can’t trust that he won’t come back.
“Come on,” Varius says, ducking his head to press a kiss to my forehead. “Let’s go bury our daughter.”
I rear back to look at him. My throat burns at the idea of seeing her one last time. Of being there when she’s sent off into the ether. Of having that closure. “You haven’t taken her into your shadows already?” I rasp, barely letting myself believe it. It’s been months...
His eyes grow wet as he looks at me. “I was waiting for you; we should tell her goodbye together.”
Closing my eyes, I finally tell him to take me home.
Sixty-Eight
HER
Perhaps I will regret it later that I don’t hunt Sadist and Eduardo down myself. But right now, I am content to let the others have that honor for what they did to Rudy.
All I want is to see Rafiki.
To hold her for the first time.
After Sau heals us (she shifted her arteries around inside her body in the split second it took for Antonio to bite her, then healed herself), Aleric phases the two of us home. He drops us off at the edge of the ward before he disappears back to the boat. As we walk through the shimmering blue shield surrounding the Shadow House, dripping water from our clothes, a flood of emotions hits me all at once.
Relief mixed with dread mixed with disbelief.
Is it really over?
Am I really safe?
Is he really dead?
I feel like I’ve gotten to the happy parts of a trauma-filled romance, only to notice there is still a good chunk of the book left. Like something is going to happen in those final pages.
My stomach churns as I walk along with him in silence.
I want to tell him “I’m sorry” for what I did to him, but every time I think about those two words, my thoughts are consumed by Grubs saying them. By the feel of his hands on my body. His dick inside my pussy.
Then my throat tightens, and I can’t get anything out.
