Page 98 of Beneath the Blue Moon
I left him.Fuck!The one thing in my life that was perfectand I left him.The tears roll down my cheeks in earnest as I realize thegravity of what I’ve done.My heart constricts, and I fear it’s about to giveout.I clutch his shirt tightly as Clara tries to soothe me.
“You and Ethan need to work this thing out.You both can’tcontinue like this.”
“You’ve seen him?”
I sit up and stare at her expectantly, drying my eyes with atissue.
“Yes.Only he’s taken to the bottle.His mother is sick withworry.”
His mother.She’s the one responsible.
“There’s nothing to work out.He’ll get over it when he seesit’s for the best.”
“Best for whom?”Clara asks.“You’re both hurting.”
“Best for him.He deserves better than me.”
She places her palm gently on my cheek.“Sweetheart, you areexactlywhat he needs.”
I’m not Shae.She’swhat he needs.Clara walks out,closing the door behind her.I look over at the tray she brought in and mystomach rumbles.I guess Iamhungry after all.I grab my phone and dialSandy’s number as I eat.I haven’t spoken to her in a while; I haven’t spokento anyone.Even Anna’s called a few times, but I haven’t been very sociablelately.
“Casey Fiona!”she exclaims.“Why haven’t you returned anyof my calls?”
“Sandy…” My voice breaks.
“What’s wrong?”
“I broke up with Ethan.”
“What?Why?”
“I don’t wanna talk about it but… I feel like I’m dying here.”
“What did he do?”
“Nothing.He was perfect.”
“It’s your commitment thing, isn’t it?You chased him offbecause it was getting serious.”
“That’s not it, either.Look, I called for you to cheer meup not make me feel worse.”
“I’m sorry, hon,” she says in a soft voice.“Maybe it’s agood time for me to take that trip out there.”
“Really?You’d come?”
“Why not?I’ve got some vacation time.Plus, I need to seeall these handsome men you keep telling me about.”
“Oh, it’s going to be so much better having you here!”
“I know.Just like old times.”
“Exactly,” I agree.
“Okay.Let me get on these arrangements.I’ll call you whenI’ve sorted it all out.”
“Great.Thanks, Sandy.”
“You’re going to be fine, hon.I’ll talk to you later.”
