Page 123 of Free to Live
Em says, “Yes there are. Phil taught us the right ones. We’re family.”
We stand in our huddle for a few minutes before the air changes. A male hand slides over Phil’s shoulder. “Thank you, brother,” Keene says hoarsely. “You didn’t just save them, you saved me too.” Cassidy and Ali start sobbing uncontrollably. From bitter rivals trying to find their way in a complicated family dynamic, the two men have become so close throughout the years as the wounds of Keene’s past healed.
Caleb comes up behind Cassidy. “That’s true of all of us.”
I feel Joe’s warmth behind me even though he doesn’t say anything. He nods his head against my shoulder in assent.
Tears are falling down Phil’s face hard and fast. Jason pushes in between him and Cassidy. “I’ve been in love with you since the moment Corinna pulled you into the lake on top of me.”
Watery laughs break out around our huddle. Jason continues. “I’d do it all over again right alongside you.”
Phil’s face contorts, and he shoves his face against Jason’s shoulder.
Then Charlie pushes in on Phil’s other side. He tugs him into his arms tightly. We all hear him whisper, “Love you, son. Proud of the man you became and the family you raised.”
It takes hours for us to recover from Phil breaking down in Charlie’s arms.
* * *
Later that night,I’m tracing my fingers around the tattoo on Joe’s wrist where the arrow rests. His tattoo was difficult because of the scars he sustained from being burned a few years back while rescuing a resident from Collyer’s local nursing home. It’s what took both him and Brett out of the field and put them both permanently on desk duty. Joe sustained burns to 15 percent of his body, Brett 20.
They both recovered, but it wasn’t easy.
We had to endure painful skin grafts. There were physical therapy sessions which put Joe into a deep depression that affected our kids. And finally, I put my foot down and demanded he get help from psychologists brought in by Victims Assistance, Alice, even Seth. Joe was infuriated, saying he was handling it.
“You’re not!” I remember screaming at him. “I’m so afraid I’m going to lose you the way you lost Mary, and I’ll be the one broken.” I tore out of our house and jumped in the car to just get away from his bitterness, his frustration—all being taken out on me because I loved him through the anger, pain, and fear.
By the time I got home six hours later, having forgotten my cell on the kitchen charger, Joe was frantic. When I walked in, eyes swollen from crying my frustration out at Candlewood Lake, he’d been running his good hand over his closely shorn hair in aggravation.
“Don’t you ever go driving off when you’re that upset!” he’d roared the minute I’d walked in the door. “Do you know how out of my mind I’ve been trying to reach you? And where’s your phone?” He’d picked it up and threw it across the room. It shattered the screen.
It was the first emotion he’d shown since he realized he was going to be benched after the fire.
I burst into tears.
It wasn’t the first time over the next several weeks either of us would, but God, were they healing.
Joe’s mental and physical recovery made him realize the criticality of the Victims Assistance program more than ever. When his father offered him the chief role, deciding it was time to turn over the reins to a new generation and spend more time with Denise, he turned it down. Instead, Joe went before Collyer’s Town Council to ask for funding for an assistant chief position to be created with that role directly in charge of a more formalized Victims Assistance Program for both the CFD and CPD. He was eloquent when he stated, “We’re losing too many of our brothers and sisters to the aftereffects of their jobs. We ask them to be our heroes, but we don’t give them the tools to regain their superpowers.”
It was a unanimous vote of approval.
As for me, Amaryllis Photography doubled in work with the marketing Jenna put out there. I still focus on my first love, weddings, but I finally found a full-time photography hire who is more than able to handle all other special occasion events—things like graduations and family reunions. It was a good thing Ali never quite got around to teaching Megan Murphy how to write her resume all those years ago, I think a little smugly. Otherwise, she might not be happily engaged to a certain police detective and planning her wedding for the late fall.
Feeling blessed, I close my eyes and let out a soft sigh before I kiss Joe on the most cherished part of his body.
His heart.
“What’s going through your head, Hols?” My head is tipped back so I’m looking into the dark blue eyes that breed true in the Bianco men.
But Lily? She has my eyes. They light up even the worst of our days.
“I still wonder how I deserve this life—the family, you, the kids.” Joe frowns. I quickly continue. “Every day, I’m given more blessings, Joe. So many. Tonight was another one.”
Joe slides down so his face is next to mine. “Because you have a heart that’s as gold as your eyes, as gold as the arrow I have put on my skin as a reminder of you? Because not once, but twice, you reminded me why it was so important to live?”
“Joe…” I protest, but not for long as he rolls me onto my back.
“Love has a way of obliterating pain. Haven’t we learned that?” I still as he continues to whisper, “But trust me, we earned this life. And sweetheart, we’ll continue to earn more of it. But there will be times when it gets dark. Just keep holding on to me with all the love you’ve got, and we can make it through anything together.”
