Page 82 of Free to Run
Suddenly, all my bravado fades away. “But what if it’s the end of my world with him?” And I break down into a sobbing heap.
“Oh, Ali. You have to calm down. Do you want me to call someone? Maybe one of your siblings?”
“No. No one can know, Dr. Donnelly. Especially not them.”
“Pretty soon, you won’t be able to hide it from them, unless you’re going to seek out other options, Ali,” he says seriously.
I place my hand on my belly protectively. “I have no plans beyond being the best mother I can to this baby, but it’s a complicated mess right now.” I bite my lower lip. “I just need time to adjust.”
He squeezes my hand a final time before letting it go. “Then let’s finish your exam to see how far along you are.”
My eyes widen. I never even thought about that. “You can do that? Today?”
He chuckles. “We’re going to get a nurse in here, and you’re going to see your baby in about five minutes.”
I gasp, my hand pressing down harder. “You hear that, angel? I get to see you in just a few minutes,” I whisper.
“Okay, Alison. Based on how far along I suspect you are from the information about your last period, strip from the waist down. This is going to be a transvaginal ultrasound.”
Looking up at him from a haze of euphoria and fear, I ask, “What does that mean?”
“Well…” He pauses as the nurse knocks. Opening the door, she pushes a portable ultrasound machine into the room and approaches me with a sheet. “It means we stick this”—he holds up a phallic-shaped probe—“inside. Then we’ll be able to hear the baby’s heartbeat and get some pictures. Maybe that will help make it easier to break the news to Daddy.”
Keene. Just the thought of him not being here right now hurts. I should have told him. Suddenly, an idea comes to my mind. “Dr. Donnelly, can you give me a minute?”
He looks down at his watch. “How about three of them? You can get changed, and then we can get ready.”
Perfect. As he and the nurse walk out of the room, I grab my cell phone, and I quickly call Holly.
“Hey, Ali. What’s up?”
“Listen, you know it’s Keene’s birthday next week, right?” I rush out with this idea. I don’t know why I think he’ll be thrilled over the news of our child. I just feel it deep in my soul.
“Yep. What the hell are you getting him? I have no freaking idea,” she grumbles.
“That’s why I’m calling. I need your help.” Quickly, I tell her what I’m looking for—a bunch of photos I know she’s taken, simply because she’s Holly—of Keene and I put together in black and white in a matted frame. “What do you think?” I ask anxiously.
“I think it’s perfect. What are you doing in the other blank spots?” she asks curiously.
“That’s part of the surprise. Keene gets to know before everyone else does.” I’m adamant that I’m not telling my siblings about how I’ve finally fallen in love, or about the baby until I tell him.
Holly laughs in my ear. “I think I can guess. And if I’m right, he’s damn lucky to have you. I’ll have it ready in a few days.”
Perfect. I hear a knock at the door. “Gotta go. The doctor’s about to clear me for running.” Which he has to do once I know our baby is okay.
“Sounds good. Love you,” Holly says.
“Love you too,” I repeat.
Suddenly, the panic of telling Keene is gone, and all I feel is the excitement burning in my soul. This may be soon, way too soon, but this is right between us.
“You ready to see your baby, Ali?” Dr. Donnelly pokes his head around the door.
I shimmy out of my shorts and panties, letting them drop to the floor. Snagging the sheet, I wrap it around my waist. I feel euphoric. “I can’t wait. Let’s see the little bean.”
He laughs as he comes back into the room. “A little larger than that if I’m right. More like a grape.”
I’m confused. A grape?
