Page 46 of Only Everything
“You have a waterfall?”
“It’s not big, but yeah, I do.”
“How much land do you have? You say you bought this place, but you haven’t really told me much about it. You haven’t even really given me a tour of the inside.” I looked over my shoulder, pointing back with my thumb. “Do you have a second bedroom? I saw a door at the end of the hall by the laundry room. It’s hidden around a slight corner. I tried to peek in, but the door was locked.”
Reid gave a dismissive wave as he opened the barrier and swept us outside.
“It’s a wreck in there.” His tone was dismissive but off. “It’s a second bedroom, but I’m using it as storage. I like the couch better anyway.”
“Oh…well, you can’t sleep there forever. I’ll take the back room. I can help you clean it out.”
The happiness faded, draining from his face, triggering suspicion. Expressions shifted going from sadness to anger to what I was sure was amusement. They were all so conflicting. I knew I couldn’t have been reading him right.
“Taur, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking, and I’m trying my best to give you time. I love this place. It was barely livable when I first bought it, but I’ve changed that. I’m attached, and I’m fond of it here, but I’m willing to give this up. To do whatever you want to make you happy. Maybe you’ll decide you want to move. Maybe you won’t. I understand that you may not end up feeling the way I do by the time this is over with. I’ve accepted that. You’ll get a new job. You’ll…take it day by day.” Something dark crept in his stare, and he quickly turned, not meeting my gaze as he pulled me ahead. “And that’s okay if that’s what you decide. We’ll give it time just like you asked. If you decide you don’t want to move, and you can’t be with me…I’ll unlock that door. The room will be yours.”
CHAPTER 17
REID
I wasstupid to let myself get attached too quickly. I’d opened my heart despite knowing Tauren could rip it to pieces, and now I was seeing my fears play out. And not just concerning her independence. I did want her to have that, but I wanted to feel secure about our future too. I didn’t. Paranoia said Tauren was using me. Maybe not even intentionally, but I couldn’t shake the red flags that kept me distant. Something wasn’t right. It was the missing link between her being with me and leaving me, and I was too obsessed with her to see it. The veil of infatuation was hiding the truth, and with it, I could feel the madness within saturate my sanity.
I had to step back.
I had to see.
The need for space had come and gone. I gave her what she wanted. But then something happened. She was more direct. More… watchful of me. What was I missing?
My eyes went to my open bedroom door for thehundredth time. Footsteps padded along the wooden floor, and my lips pressed into each other as she got dressed for her job hunt. Again. We kept doing this same dance. This same every day fucking routine. The first day we walked to the waterfall. The second day, she job hunted while I secretly followed. Afterward, I took her to the cave I’d found on one of my runs. The third day, she left again—I left—and when she returned, we strolled my usual path as I pointed out landmarks, telling her why they were important. Each day—a week—more days, Tauren was forcing herself out. But I saw her relief when she finally made it home. She was getting stronger, and she seemed to enjoy our time together. But where did she stand? Where didwestand? Friends.Bestfriends?
If only it were enough. It wasn’t with the way she was changing and becoming stronger. I was trying to be patient. I was trying to be supportive. After all, wasn’t that what love was all about?
Maybe for normal people.
I wasn’t normal; I was a machine. It didn’t matter that I was stalking her. Or that I had a tracker on her car. Or even that I’d started carving her name into my forearm as I bled out the time she was jumping from business to business for applications. Nothing mattered but the overall picture we were working towards, and fear screamed she was going to see that she was too good for me. I was… needy. A wreck without her. She had to have seen that.
Dark hair swayed as Tauren peeked out of my door. I was sitting on the edge of the sofa, my hands clasped as I kept my arms resting on my lower thighs. My head wasangled down, even if my eyes were cut up. I immediately eased to sit as her lids narrowed the smallest amount.
“You okay? I was just checking to see if you were awake. I figured you were. I don’t think you sleep for more than a few hours at a time.”
“Sorry, I was going over my plans for today. I heard you moving around, but I didn’t want to disturb you.”
“Oh.” Tauren stepped more into the threshold. She was wearing a soft pink dress but was still barefoot. Her fingers gripped to her hem while she rocked on her feet. “Plans? Do you have errands to run? Or were you referring to doing something here?”
There it was. There was something more than curiosity lurking. Was it the concern in her tone? Sadness? Yearning? I had to get her to be open and honest. I needed to shake things up, or we’d never get past this stage. I owed her time. How much more did she need?
“It’s complicated.” I kept my attention at her expression as she clung to my every word. “Pretty dress. It looks good on you. Are you going job hunting again?”
She glanced down, waving her hand in dismissal.
“Yeah. Maybe.I don’t know. I was going to but—What do you mean, complicated? What are your plans?”
The wheels in my brain turned as I took in how antsy she was. She kept shifting, almost impatiently, and her fingers were starting to twist into the dress. I didn’t think Tauren was hiding anything from me, but maybe she needed a push to test her feelings? Something was messing with her head the longer time went by, and thatthinghad to be me.Us.
“Are you okay? Do you need to talk about anything?”
She paused, and my fear grew as the time stretched out.
Was she looking for words to say she wanted to move on? Was she looking for a way to let me down easily? Everything was going so well, wasn’t it?
