Page 50 of Jase
Lips crushed into mine. The fire in my veins went from seething to sultry with the sweep of his tongue. Fingers pushed through the back of my hair, and I was on the bed with his weight on me before I could stop my legs from trying to wrap around his waist. He cradled me so tenderly, yet so in control. It was careful, but it was protective.
“Yes or no. That’s all the choices I get?” He kissed me softer, moving down to suck against my neck.
“That’s it. It’s simple and nonnegotiable.”
He lifted, grasping to my hip as he forced himself to become still. “I’ve gotten to know you well enough to say there’s nothing simple about you. Not even this ultimatum. I made a promise. I couldn’t keep Fahima safe, but I can do that for you. Don’t you see?”
“Wait. You can’t tell me that and give no explanation.”
His face tightened. He lifted, turning to sit on the edge of the bed. “She was the girl who brought us food and water. I don’t even think she was technically supposed to be there, but for some reason they allowed it.”
“Girl? How old was she?”
“Ten, when they brought her in. She kept to herself, but after a few months she came around. She spoke surprisingly good English. She was afraid and wanted to go home. I never found out where that was. A little after a year of being there, something happened with her father. I could hear her screaming. Hours went by. We were all a wreck and pissed off at that point. She was our only form of communication that wasn’t the enemy. She brought us dinner, begging us to help. I guess the father was injured. I told her I would try. I told her we’d come up with a plan. Someone overheard her talking to us.” Jase looked up from the floor, turning to face me. “They raped and killed that little girl in front of us and left her there to rot. She was still there when we managed to get free.The smell. The sight.” He glared as he went back to staring in the distance. “I swore to her every day I’d find the men who were responsible. Back then, those types came and went. I spent years looking, searching. I never found the real ones. There were some…similar men on the dark web, but it wasn’t the same. I failed her. I let my promise go unfulfilled. Do you know what that kind of guilt does to a person?” He gave his head a swift shake as if trying to forget. “Anyway, I decided it was time again. I found you. Isavedyou from David.”
“And you got justice. You got it, Jase.”
“Not like I wanted. Like he deserved. It’s not enough. There’s more—”
“There will always be more.Look at me.” I scooted closer, reaching for his hand. “Right now, you’re in a position to help. You know more than anyone. Who’s going to help us if you’re dead? Think about it. No one knows how to find people like you. You mentioned the number of victims yourself. We need you.” My throat tightened as I held tighter to his hand. “I need you. I don’t want to leave. I don’t want this friendship between us to end on bad terms. I’m telling you, though, if you keep going like you are now, I can’t stay. I will have lost you either way.”
Dark eyes searched mine. All I witnessed was half pain, half hell. I saw his need. I also saw the conflict.
“What if I don’t have a choice but to kill?”
“You know that’s a different story. All I’m saying is, help from here as much as you can. Give the info you find to the right people. If something happens and they come after us again, then that’s on them.”
Heavy silence stretched out. Jase stood, heading towards the door. My lips parted as I searched for something, anything to say to try to convince him. Pride wouldn’t let me speak. I wasn’t going to beg any man to protect me. He was the safest, but I had other options. I had the police. The FBI. They had to do something. I’d figure it out. I could do this on my own.
The light turned off, and I blinked through the darkness that took over.
“What are you doing?”
Footsteps approached the bed, sending my heart exploding in my chest.
“It’s been a long night. We both need sleep. It’ll be better this way.”
The bed shifted and hands grabbed my hips, pulling me higher on the mattress. When his fingers trailed the inside of my elbow, down to my wrist, I let him lay me back and lift my good arm over my head. Weight settled on half of my body while he fit the cuff around and buckled it just as tight as I really needed.
“Are you…”
Fingertips caressed over my sensitive skin, moving from wrist to elbow while he held his position.
“Am I what, Kody?”
“Staying in here?”
“I planned on it. Do you want me to loosen the cuff and leave?”
Jase’s touch paused, dropping to my waist as he tucked his hold under my hip and spun me to my side. The tug had me fitting against him as he held around me. My eyes instantly closed. I may have only been in his t-shirt, but he was still completely clothed.
“You can stay.”
He reached down, pulling the covers up over me, and returning to his place once again. The weight of his arm alone was a comfort I didn’t know I needed. As Jase’s breaths deepened, I stared ahead, wondering what was going to happen. I’d stand my ground, but what would he decide? I needed to know soon. From the kiss to…this, there was too much risk if things didn’t change. I wasn’t worried about jail for being an accessory. I could live behind bars; there wasn’t pain in that. What I couldn’t live with was being hurt on the inside. Not even by a friend or savior. My mind was fragile. I was all too aware of just how much.
I closed my eyes, surrendering. Soft snores lulled me into dreams of better days. Back to books and laughter with my mom. The valley was always so hot during the summer. The windows would be open, and we’d be praying for a breeze. The neighbor’s stable wasn’t too far away. I’d sneak out to pet their horses in the evenings when it cooled.
Almonds and horses.The orchard behind our house was the Dickerson’s too. I could still feel the cool ground beneath my feet in the fall as I snuck to my favorite spot. I’d read and eat my snacks.Eat and dream.I could see it. Taste it as I was transported back. I had so many aspirations in my youth. Not that I knew back then lawyers probably had one of the most stressful jobs in the world. As a kid I thought they helped solve mysteries. I used to be intrigued by puzzles. Scary puzzles. After all, who didn’t want adventure and mystery in their life?
