Page 27 of Surprise Me Tonight
Fuck! Fucking hell!
I crank up the incline, push harder. Every part of me hurts, but my brain’s still louder than the machine.
What the hell was I thinking?
That kiss — right there in the pub, in front of half the village, in front of whoever the fuck that guy was. Some bloke who had her cornered, grabbing her wrist, talking to her like she was nothing. I don’t know who he is. Didn’t care. Still don’t.
All I knew was she looked cornered. Like she wanted to vanish. And that bastard had his hand on her.
And I—
I couldn’t stand it.
I stepped in. Said something. He said something worse. Called her a slut, made some crack about her being old. And thenI—
Fucking hell.
I kissed her.
Like some caveman trying to make a point. Mark his territory. I didn’t plan it. I didn’t think. Ireacted.
And it felt—
Fuck.
I shouldn’t even think about how it felt. Her mouth on mine. The way she didn’t pull away. The way she looked at me afterward, like the whole room had dropped away and it was just us.
But it doesn’t matter.
It was a mistake.
A massive, inappropriate, unprofessional fucking mistake.
I pound the treadmill harder. Still not enough. Not even close.
Jess is going to murder me. Or worse — be disappointed in that calm, clipped voice she reserves for when I’ve really cocked something up. Stella probably won’t even show up today. Why would she? Her boss manhandled her face and kissed her like she was his to claim.
Because she looked vulnerable?
Because she looked beautiful?
Because something in me snapped when that arsehole laid a hand on her?
After I had escorted Stella away from the wanker, Jasper and I left the pub.
Jasper let out a short laugh, then shook his head. “Bloody hell, mate. Kissing your PA in the middle of the pub? People will still be talking at Christmas.”
His grin faded as quick as it came. “But seriously. You need to think about this. You’re her boss. People will talk, and she’s the one they’ll be talking about.”
“I don’t even know why I did it,” I said, though the words felt thin. I did know. Part of me wanted to claim her, right there in front of that twat. But that wasn’t exactly a defence, was it.
“She didn’t push me away.”
“Maybe she froze. Maybe she liked it. Maybe she didn’t know how to react.” He leaned forward, all trace of humour gone. “You don’t know, mate, because you didn’t ask. And you need to. This isn’t just about you.”
And he was right.
But she kissed me back. I’m sure of it. The way her mouth parted under mine, the way her hand brushed against my chest before she seemed to realise what she was doing. That wasn’t freezing. That wasn’t nothing.
