Page 138 of Roulette Rodeo
"Where does that leave Sophia then?" I ask, the question tumbling out before I can stop it. "Was she from your world too? Another ranch girl or...?"
The laughter fades, replaced by something more complicated. He studies my face for a long moment, and I can see him weighing his words.
"Do you really want to know?" His voice is careful now, the doctor voice he probably uses to deliver difficult diagnoses.
I think about it seriously.
Do I want to know about the ghost that haunts this pack? The woman whose death clearly broke something fundamental between them? The name Luca threw around like a weapon?
I'm here now. Part of this, whether we're all ready for it or not.
And I'd rather know the truth than constantly wonder what landmines I'm stepping around.
"Yes," I say firmly. "I want to understand."
He sighs, his hand still on my waist, thumb still making those absent circles that are definitely not helping my concentration.
"Sophia was... complicated." He pauses, clearly choosing his words carefully. "She wasn't from our world, not originally. She was from Chicago, met Rafe at some charity function his family was hosting. Upper-class omega from a 'good' family—the kind that still believed in traditional omega roles."
"Traditional how?"
"Silent, submissive, decorative," he lists off, and there's distaste in his voice. "She'd been raised to be the perfect omega wife—could host dinner parties, knew which fork to use, never spoke unless spoken to in mixed company. Her family saw Rafeas a perfect match. Powerful family, good bloodlines, enough money to keep her in the style she was accustomed to."
"But that's not what Rafe wanted?"
"It's what he thought he wanted," Corwin corrects looking deep in thought. "Or maybe what he thought he deserved. After everything with his family's business, the violence, the things he'd done... I think part of him thought someone pure and perfect like Sophia would somehow balance the scales."
He shifts slightly, and I can feel the tension in his body as he talks about this.
"The problem was, Sophia fell for the idea of being mated to a dangerous man more than she fell for Rafe himself. Or any of us, really. She liked the thrill of it at first—the danger, the mystery, the way other omegas looked at her with envy because she'd landed not just one alpha but a whole pack."
Like yearning to have those mob book boyfriends and thinking you won the lottery in real life…
"But?"
"But living with danger and living with the idea of danger are very different things." His voice goes darker. "When she realized we weren't playing at being dangerous, when she saw what we actually were capable of... it scared her. She started pulling back, spending more time with other omegas in the city, comparing her life to theirs."
I nod slowly, starting to piece together the tragedy.
"She met this other omega," Corwin continues, "someone who made her realize she didn't have to stay if she wasn't happy. That omega helped her see that what she felt wasn't love but obligation and fear dressed up as attraction."
"So she tried to leave?"
"She did leave," he corrects. "Packed her things one day while we were all out, left a note saying she couldn't do it anymore. That was when things got complicated."
He pauses, taking a sip of his latte, and I wait patiently for him to continue.
"Rafe went after her. Not to force her back, but to talk. To understand. Luca went with him—they were still best friends then, both convinced they could fix this if they just explained better, loved her harder, gave her more of whatever she needed."
"But that wasn't the problem." I can envision it all now in my mind, the dynamic and the Omega stuck in the middle of it all, convinced her fairytale that she’d envision wasn’t like the written fiction she obsessed with.
"No," he agrees. "The problem was she didn't love them. Either of them. Any of us really.She'd tried to force herself to feel something that wasn't there, and the pressure of pretending broke her."
His hand tightens slightly on my waist, an unconscious gesture.
"They found her at a hotel in the city. The argument got heated. Not violent," he adds quickly, "none of us would ever—but emotional. Luca and Rafe started fighting with each other, each blaming the other for her wanting to leave. Sophia tried to intervene, to get them to stop, and..."
He trails off, and I can fill in the blanks.
