Page 53 of Thorns That Bloom
“My mom never let me cook. Dad would say that it’s a woman’s job.” I make a bitter grimace. Judging from the glance he gives me, Theo agrees.
“Some betas have weirdly strict gender roles.”
“Yeah. I don’t like it much, anyway. It’s a lot happening at once. Stresses me out. All the things that need to be checked at certain times so it all comes together…”
Theo grins. “That’s what’s fun aboutit. Turning a lot of nothing into something delicious.”
Before I can respond, he opens another door for me. This one leads to a small inset balcony. It’s almost like the architects chose a random office and replaced the outside wall with glass panels that span from the floor to about chest height. The ceiling from the floor above is still overhead, sheltering the area from the worst of the weather. The offices on either side are perfectly normal, and their walls enclose this unexpected outdoor space. There are a couple of metal benches and a few big planters with ferns that look like they've seen better days.
“Tadaaa!” he sings, presenting it with his hand.
“You sure nobody will mind us being here?” I ask while I walk out. It’s not too cold or windy, so I sit down, putting the container on top of my thighs. The balcony faces the east car park, with the tiny wooded area behind it.
Theo leans against the railing and rummages in his backpack. The exact moment I look down at the container, wondering how I’m going to eat, he pulls out two sets of cutlery with a sharp ‘Aha!’
“Thought of everything, huh?” I note with a crooked smile. He smiles back, a faint blush dancing on his cheeks. He passes the spoon to me and opens his container. “Are you going to eat standing up? You…ugh.” I let out a frustrated snort. “You can sit next to me, you know? It’s fine. I’m not…”
“I wasn’t sure. I didn’t want to push into your—”
“Friends can sit next to each other, can’t they?” I reply dryly, making sure to roll my eyes so Theo can see. It works well to hide the fact that my chest warms a little over how careful he’s being.
When I open the container, the food looks as good as itsmells, if not better. Fresh baby spinach leaves and Parmesan are sprinkled on top as garnish. The sauce covering the rice is vibrant green and smooth as I stir everything together.
I take a spoonful in and my taste buds explode with flavor. Moaning, I close my eyes as I chew, feeling Theo’s gaze on me, but I don’t let it bother me.
“You like it then?” he asks with a quiet chuckle.
“Fuck. That’s divine.” I don’t care how unhinged I sound. I take another bite, savoring the creamy, rich dish. I guess risotto is my new favorite. Even the baby finally stops stirring and kicking, and I wonder if they can taste it. Probably not. I almost don’t want to admit it out loud, but… “This is the best thing to happen to me today,” I mutter, licking my lips.
Theo eats his portion next to me, but he doesn’t look nearly as affected. In fact, he barely seems interested in the food. In my endless pregnant hunger, I nearly ask him if he wouldn’t mind giving me his portion, too.
“How so?” Tender care pulses through his voice when he asks that. “Not having a good day?”
“No. Well, now I am.”
Theo doesn’t smile back. He looks at me like I’m some hurt puppy, so I stop eating and sigh. I never should’ve mentioned it. Of course he’s worried.
“Some days are harder to deal with than others,” I say quietly.
His eyes soften even more. I don’t want him to look at me that way. And yet…it’s hard to be angry at such a kind expression. His beautiful eyes search my face, lips pursed with concern. So I say nothing. I swallow any biting remarks and hang my head.
“I’m sorry. I don’t know what else to say.”
Me neither.
“Nothing more youcansay.”
“Is there anything I can do? I could leave, if you’d like to be alone?”
With a scoff, I glare sharply at him. “If I were in a state where I couldn’t handle being around anyone, I wouldn’t have agreed to meet, would I? Do I look like I did in the restroom that one time?” Theo nearly flinches, as though I struck him, and I watch his expression morph from worry into panic. It makes me even more frustrated, so I turn away again and take a slow breath to bring my spiking pulse under control. “Youarehelping. The food is helping. Itwas, anyway. Before you started making that bleeding-heart face. I appreciate this. I just need you to stop acting like I’m made of glass or something.”
My stomach clenches. I hate myself for feeling this way. For saying those things in that sharp tone when all he’s trying to do is help.
“I’m sorry,” he whispers.
I sigh. “No, I am. I’m just… I haven’t been sleeping well. My nerves and my hormones are all over the place. Your delicious food and your…stupid face distracted me, so let’s get back to that, alright?”
Theo’s low laugh gives me the courage to look back at him. Finally, that pity seems to fade away. “Alright. I…I’m happy you like it.”
