Page 40 of Thorns That Bloom
“Wait, wait, wait. Fated mate? Your Pop didn’t say anything aboutthat,” he blurts, putting his finger up as if to stop me while his mouth hangs open.
I roll my eyes, sinking my head back into the pillows and plush toys with a loud groan. “Right…because I didn’t tell him. Because I knew what he would think. How he would react,” I say, gesturing back at his own shocked face to prove my point. “Like everyone does when I try to talk to them about it. Everyone acts like I’m crazy or stupid. Or both. Maybe I am…”
His silence scares me a little. Dad shifts back to face ahead, his shoulder still pressed against mine, just sitting there with me in the darkness for a moment.
“I didn’t know you believed in that sort of thing.”
“Well, I didn’t until I met Sam,” I whisper, a little dejectedby all the judgment. But Dad’s silence now doesn’t feel like he’s judging me; it feels expectant, so I hesitantly continue. “I’ve never felt this way before. I thought…that I loved Emily, at least at the beginning. And Ronnie. But this is…incomparable. Stronger. Deeper. It’s like I've never experiencedlovebefore, Dad. I can’t describe it, and it doesn’t make sense. Which is probably why no one but religious extremists believes this stuff. It just…clicks. All the stereotypical crap I know about fated mates—from the ‘you can’t think about anybody else and you don’t want to think about anybody else’ to the ‘life as you knew it ends the moment you meet your match’...it all just fits perfectly, okay?”
I finally turn to him, baring my everything with a desperate, tired expression.
Dad stares at me through the dim light for a while. Then, his thin lips spread out into a tentative smile. “You’re right that Pop probably wouldn’t be very receptive to this. Especially not with the implications of what fated mates are. You know…a special, unique, fated connection between an alpha and omega exclusively.”
Glancing down, he chuckles to himself, as if he thought of something. I stay quiet to hear him out.
“All our lives, people around us told us that we… Not that we didn’t belong together, but that we coulddo better. They told us two omegas can’t reach true fulfillment. That it’s supposed to be between an alpha and omega. ‘That’s how we were made to be.’ Then they laughed when we wanted to get pregnant. ‘It’s nearly impossible,’ they said. ‘The chances are so low.’ But we did it,” he says, lovingly brushing a strand of the longer hair at the top of my head back behind my ear.
“So…I can’t say I understand or believe this fated mates thing, but your father and I belong together. We always did and always will, no matter what the world or the people say, and I always knew that in my heart. If you’re as sure about this as we’ve always been about us, then it’s not really that different. And it can’t be wrong. Besides, if love doesn’t make you feel a little crazy, you’re not doing it right. Just be certain this Sam feels the same way, okay?”
Are my eyes watering? Dammit, my eyes are watering.
“Yeah, of…of course,” I say, rubbing my face, hoping to hide it from him. But he probably already knows. “I would never push him, I would never—”
Before he can enjoy feeling like I’m his little boy again and comfort me with the help of Mr. Fluffers, someone else barges into the room. Pop turns on the big overhead light, leaving both of us squinting in discomfort and protesting at the sudden visual attack.
“What the hell is going on here? Theo, is that you? Wh— What did I miss? What’s going on?” Pop puts his glasses on and tries to focus his eyes, which he seems to struggle with. I laugh through my tears and shake my head.
“Nothing, dear,” Dad says with a knowing smile, giving me a quick glance. “Our son is staying overnight. That’s not a problem, is it?” He stands up and ruffles my hair before going to Pop and kissing him on the cheek like nothing out of the ordinary’s happening.
He still looks painfully confused, but quickly catches on. “Okay…? Err, should I make hot cocoa?”
“No, no,” I say. “I’m going to sleep. I’m beat, and I’ve bothered you enough.”
“Are you sure?”
“I’m sure. Thanks,” I say to the both of them.
Seeing them together, Dad holding Pop around the waist and openly enjoying the sight of him all sleepy and perplexed, fills my chest with comforting warmth. It makes me a little more hopeful about my situation, even though right now, it’s pretty damn bleak.
I need to be patient, like Dad said. No matter how long it takes. All I care about is Sam and the baby being happy.
And that’s okay.It’s what I feel, and no one can take that away from me.
With that knowledge, I wave them goodnight and sink back into the mountain of my childhood toys, ready to fall asleep and hopefully dream of Sam.
Chapter 13
Sam
Ever since that evening with Theo, I can’t get it together. In my next therapy session, we don’t talk about much at all. I think Angel can tell I’m not ready to talk about whatever happened, so we just sit there in embarrassing silence for minutes at a time. Sure, it’s under the premise of meditating and focusing on my breathing, but I know it’s because she doesn’t know how to get me to open up.
At this point, I’m wasting both of our time.
The meditation does nothing it is supposed to. Every time I close my eyes, it only makes my mind run wilder. It brings images and flashes of things I want to forget and ignore to the forefront over and over again.
At work, I’m even more anxious than in therapy. No more going to the cafeteria for lunch. I stay locked in my office, withdrawing back into myself for protection. I dread him coming up to see me and me having to face it all.
Thankfully, he doesn’t. He has that decency, at least.
