Page 23 of Thorns That Bloom
God, he looks like an excited puppy when he heads my way.
I slowly move toward the door while he catches up. I can’t stand the idea of everyone’s eyes being on us. Leaning against the wall by the huge potted plant next to the doors to the cafeteria, I cross my arms over my chest and take a deep breath.
“Hey,” Theo says, stopping a few steps away from me. He almost seems more anxious than I am, darting his eyes all over and smiling hesitantly. “You, um…got my note?” He nervously lifts his arm to scratch the back of his head, unintentionally showing off the tight, bulging biceps.
“Yeah. I-I appreciate it.” I keep my voice firm, for the most part. “I wanted to apologize for making a fuss with all that. I hope you didn’t get into any trouble.”
I can hardly meet his eyes, no matter how confident I try to appear, and I’m not sure why. It’s not like he’s hard to look at.
He shakes his head. “Oh, no. It’s fine! I was just hoping you and the baby were okay,” he says and hesitantly points at my stomach.
The fact that he’s thinking about that takes me aback. He did in the note, too. “It was only a panic attack,” I say quietly, looking down. “It didn’t hurt the baby or anything.” He seems like a caring person. It makes it that much more frustrating that I dragged him into it.
“I’m glad,” he says, his voice soft, almost tender. I meet his careful gaze as he shifts on his feet, both hands in his pockets now. “Do you know the sex?”
The way he asks the question, in such a light-hearted, curious tone, isn’t threatening. I hesitantly smile and shake my head. “Not yet.”
Then it hits me. His scent is faint, the same smell of spiced coconut, but it’s mixed with traces of his sweat. And somehow, the combination makes my cheeks burn.
My body reacts to it without me even focusing on it properly, and I feel my stomach twist in a different way. Not so much from anxiety, but…a pleasant way that I haven’t experienced in a while.
And that’s when all that information truly registers inside my brain. It feels like since it happened, my connection between the two has been damaged. When my brain realizes the way my body reacts to the manly,alphascent in front of me, it seizes. It rings with caution. Alarm.
'You shouldn’t like this smell,' it says. 'It means danger and nothing else.'
Desperately trying to suppress the reaction I know is unreasonable, I flare my nostrils and keep my face neutral,hoping not to show my inner turmoil.
“You’re new here, right?” Theo asks.
I half expected, and hoped, for him to just walk away, but he doesn’t. Instead, he’s going into awkward small talk.
Darting my eyes around us, I remind myself that we’re in a room full of people. I’m safe. Logically, there’s nothing threatening or dangerous about this situation at all. Especially not with that puppy face of his. He’s looking at me with a strange tenderness, hanging on for an answer like it actually means something to him, and he’s not just going through the bullet point questions people ask each other when there’s nothing else to talk about.
“Yeah.” I try not to think about his scent as I speak, gulping hard. “I moved to the city recently.”
“Alone or with family?”
That question falls out of his mouth a little too fast for comfort. Narrowing my eyes, I glance up at him, only for Theo to evade my gaze. Looking like he himself realizes the almost hopeful undertone of that word was a little too obvious.
A wave of tingling discomfort passes over my back when I realize: is he trying to flirt with me? Is he finding out if I’m single? Or if I live by myself?
‘He’s an alpha,’ that alarm sounds again, making every muscle in my body wind tighter. ‘And you are an easy target for someone like him.’
Stop. Stop thinking about that.
I gulp again, but it doesn’t seem to freaking do anything. “I umm…yeah,” I mutter, so thrown by that realization that I don’t even think to lie in time. Well, now he knows. “I’m not looking to date,” I add sharply.
I might be going through something, but I’m still me. Being direct might be a little more stressful now that I don’t have all of my confidence, but it doesn’t change who I am entirely. Who I am is someone who would make this clear right away. Especially now.
Theo widens his eyes briefly and raises his brows. With a quick, “Oh, okay,” he nods and smiles like he’s the least bothered.
What did I expect from him? To jump at me?
I have to think rationally. Of course he’s fine with it. He isn’t like them. Not everyone is like them. I’m okay. Everything is okay.
“I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable again. Would…would you prefer someone else to come up if we have a problem we need feedback for?” he asks with genuine worry in his smooth, pleasantly deep voice.
Letting out an exhale through my nose, I shake my head. “No, that’s fine,” I mutter. “I gotta go now. I've already taken enough of your lunch break.” Before he has a chance to respond, I slip away.
