Page 36 of Sinners Keepers
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“I don’t fully understandwhy my dad would shoot me when I’m worth so much more to him alive,” I said.
Alec poured me another cup of coffee and placed it on the counter in front of me.
Bless him.
“Our best guess is that it was purely self-defense. He was likely convinced you were dead or as good as, so he split. He was gone before we got there,” Ijah paused, his voice cracking as he spoke. He cleared his throat and opened his mouth again, but nothing came out. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, swallowing hard before continuing.
That made sense from what I could now remember of that night, the things he’d said to me before he left me there.
“Wethought you were dead, cupcake. Your body was lifeless and so fucking cold, covered in blood. I lost my fucking mind. If I hadn't followed you that night, you wouldn't be here. And I'll never forgive myself for not getting to you sooner." His fingers traced along the line of the scar at the base of my throat.
“It broke something in each of us seeing you like that,” Alec said, brushing my hair over the opposite shoulder with the back of his hand. “I cared so much for you, Hunny Bee. Long before I found it within myself to act on those feelings.” His eyes darted to Ijah’s, probably concerned his friend would take offense at what he’d just admitted, but Ijah just gave him a small smile. “The first moment we had hope that you’d pull through, I knew I would do some damn near shameful things to make sure you never found yourself in a situation like that again.”
“And when you woke up to me in the hospital that first time, convinced it was me who hurt you—” Ijah continued. He couldn’t seem to find the words.
I didn’t remember waking up to him at all. Only Alec. I couldn’t imagine the pain he must have felt, or how hysterical I would have been. It was hard enough waking up to Alec and thinking those things.
I climbed into his lap. I couldn’t get close enough to him, even with our bodies flush. I wanted to crack open his ribcage and climb inside his body. “I’m so sor—”
“Don’t,” he snapped, kissing me roughly. “None of this was your fault. Traumatic brain injuries are so finicky. None of us could have known that the hit your head took when you went down would have caused something like this. I’m just so fucking thankful I had these two to step in when I couldn’t be there for you.”
“Me too,” I admitted. “But why couldn’t you just tell me?” I asked.
“Fuck, we wanted to,” Law said. “More than fucking anything,somany times. But the doctors all advised against it. Trying to convince someone of something true when they’re suffering from memory loss nearly always does more harm than good. If anything, it would have added more stress to the situation and upset you even further. They said it was best just to let your memories return on their own, for us to go along with whatever persecutory delusions you were under and hope for the best.”
“Thank you for not giving up on me,” I said to the three of them.
“If we’d known you shooting that fucking gun was what it took to bring you back to reality, we’d have taken you to the shooting range the day you were released from the hospital,” Alec said, scrubbing a hand over his face.
I suspected it was because I shot itat Ijahthat triggered anything, and he was probably fucking stupid for coming home like that while I was still living in my own delusions, but I don’t know that I wouldn’t have felt the same desperation he did were the shoe on the other foot. And at the end of the day, I was glad things had played out in the way they did.
“How did my dad find out I was still alive?” I asked. “This would’ve all been so much easier if we’d just faked my death and moved on with our lives.”
“Trust me,” Alec answered. “That was very much what we wanted to do, but it’s kind of hard to pull something like that off in Fate Trace. When there was nothing in the news about your death, he had men snooping around the hospital the very next day. We put an end to thatrealfast, but he was most definitely given all the details about your health and well-being—or lack thereof.”
“How do we know I won’t just wake up one day and revert back to thinking Ijah tried to kill me? Or one of you? Or something worse?” I didn’t know what could be worse than that, but my anxiety was at an all-time high.
“Wedon’tknow,” Ijah admitted with a pained look on his face. “But what we do know is that you’ll be safe and cared for every step of the way, and we will continue to work with your doctors to make sure you stay on the right track as best we can. This is something none of us have any kind of control over, and that scares the absolute shit out of me, but I’m going to take each day as it comes with no expectations, and love you so fucking hard every chance I get. And we’ll get through it together.”
“Big fucking same,” Alec said, planting a kiss on my cheek.
Law stepped in behind me, wrapping his arms around me and kissing the shell of my ear before murmuring, “Always.”
CHAPTERTWENTY
Hunt
Law and I loaded the brown paper grocery bags into the trunk of the SUV, arranging them side by side so they fit snugly in the roomy compartment. The four of us living together apparently meant going through a lot of fucking food.
It had been days and my dad had still made no move to show himself, and I had been dying to get out of the house again.
“Can we stop by the cute little coffee shop on Sumter for a hot cocoa on the wa—” I said, turning to move away from the trunk so I could close the hatch, but Law had other plans.
My words died on my lips as his hands encircled my waist, pinning me to the back of the open trunk. His solid frame pressed against mine, and I instinctively wrapped my arms around his neck, pulling him closer.
His lips moved against mine with a gentleness that caught me totally off guard. His hands were firm on my back as the fluorescent parking lot lights hummed above us; his touch all-consuming.
