Page 21 of Home Field Advantage
My brain may be swirling with doubt and questioning every intention of this man, but I can’t deny that Ilikethis feeling. I can like this and still be in control, right?
“No boyfriend,” I say.
The corners of his lips twist up even more as if that’s the answer he wanted. The grin on his face forces one on mine, and I try to bite away my involuntary smile at him.
“I’d love to buy you a drink then. Maybe get to know you a little bit.”
Turning to face the bar, I rest both elbows on the bar top and check out what Griffin has stocked. I’ve never been much of a drinker, but when I do, I’m picky about it. As a teacher, I’ll always have this fear of going out in town, and the parents of one of my students judge me for my choices.
Will they think less of me for being out in a bar like this?
Will they go to the principal and accuse me of being an unfit teacher?
It weighs heavily on me more often than not. I grew up in this town, and everyone knows who I am, but that doesn’t stop the negative thoughts. The only reason I’m even here tonight is because it’s Lily’s birthday party, and she and Blair begged me to come out after our dinner we had before this.
I’ve gotten better about not letting the fear of judgment hold me back.
Looking back at Dallas, I decide to let him buy me a drink.
“One drink.” I hold up my index finger.
“One drink.”
Tucker passes us, and Dallas flags him down.
“What can I get you, coach?”
I raise a brow in his direction, but don’t ask why he’s calling him that. Dallas shakes his head, looking down at the bar top. He and Tucker both laugh. I feel like I’m missing something here.
“I’ll have another round of whatever Griffin poured before,” Dallas says, tipping his head in my direction. “And whatever she’s having.”
When I look at Tucker, it’s his turn to lift an eyebrow. I quickly fire him a glare, silently telling him toshut up. “I’ll have my normal. The Moscow mule.”
Tucker scoffs. “That’s not your normal.”
I narrow my eyes again.
“Oh, yes. That’s very scary—I mean, normal. Very normal,” he says flatly before moving to make our drinks.
Closing my eyes, I inhale slowly. He’s right. It’s not my norm.Nothing about this night is. But my therapist and I have discussed this, and I need to do it. Letting go of my control in every situation and allowing life to…happen.
Easier said than done.
It’s weird that I’m deciding to make the change with Dallas of all people—a stranger in town—but I have to start somewhere.
A strange silence stretches between us, though. I’m not sure if Tucker’s comments have made him second-guess this drink, or if it’s because I don’t know what I’m doing. Either way, it has me assuming the worst.
Flirting is foreign to me.
Engaging in casual conversation over a drink with areallyhot man is foreign to me.
As Tucker returns with our drinks, I straighten my spine and muster up whatever confidence I have to get through this. I take a long sip and finally turn back to face Dallas, letting myself sit on the open stool beside him.
“So, how old are you, Dallas?”
He winces. Almost as if he didn’t want to bring up this topic, and of course, I hit him with it first. “I’m thirty-five.”
Jesus. I knew Dallas seemed older, but I was not expecting him to be ten years older than me. I lift my drink to take another long sip before my brain starts spiraling with all the doubts about even talking to a man like him.
