Page 116 of Love, Academically
“I felt you were far too valuable to let you go for a few hours a week. After a surprisingly productive conversation with Rhys this morning, first thing I may add, it made me realise that I was holding you back rather than helping you progress, like a good manager should.”
Well. That was a surprise.
“Sue, I—”
“I really am sorry, Lila. I’m going through…” Sue hesitated. “My husband and I are separating, and I’ve obviously taken things out on you.” The words were rushed and clipped, evidently not something Sue wanted to share.
“Sue, I’m ever so sorry to hear that.” Gosh, what an awful thing for her to be going through.
“It is what it is,” Sue said, forcing a tight smile to her face. “Lila,I want you to take Monday and Tuesday off as well, have a nice long weekend, pamper yourself. You’ve got more than enough lieu hours, but I won’t be putting them through and it won’t go on your sick record.”
“I don’t know what to say.”
“Say ‘goodbye Sue, I’ll see you Wednesday’.”
“Okay,” Lila nodded with her first real smile for a few days, albeit small. “Bye Sue. See you on Wednesday.”
Sue ended the call, leaving Lila staring at her laptop. Huh. That was a turn-up for the books. Whatever Rhys had said certainly hit the spot. But that did not excuse him. Not even in the slightest.
Lila pulled her phone out.
It didn’t take long before Jason texted back.
Lila’s finger hovered over the little green call button on Rhys’s contact. If it were anyone else who had done this, she would have called to thank them. But no, this was Rhys. Rhys who had interfered with her life, had been vile to her and, yeah (she was big enough to admit it) broken her poor heart. Putting it right was the absolute least he could do.
So she was not going to call to thank him. She wasn’t going to contact him at all.
In fact, she was going to sit on the sofa, watch her films, eat tomato soup and wait for Jasmeet to get home so they could lament the state of her life.
Rhys
They were late. Rhys sighed and put his phone face down on the table. Dan was still mad at him, or disappointed. But at least he had agreed to meet up for a chat, which is why he was sitting in the expensive wine bar in town, in the hope that his students would prefer to go somewhere a lot cheaper.
After drinking way too much over the weekend, Rhys was thankful that they served non-alcoholic beer. He hadn’t slept, he hadn’t shaved, he’d just wandered around his grey box of a flat emptying the fridge of beer and pouring it down his neck. Both Dan and his mother had called, Elin had texted, but he hadn’tbothered answering. There was only one person that he wanted to speak to, but he couldn’t bring himself to be rejected by Lila not answering her phone or ignoring his messages.
Rhys had contemplated going to her place, but that was too much. She would not appreciate that. So he didn’t.
That devastated look on her face when he called her ‘Miss Cartwright’ and told her that she was unwanted in his office – it was seared on his eyelids and he saw it every time his eyes closed. He’d essentially said that it was her fault that he’d dropped the ball on the Fellowship application, when that was patently not true. It was him. It was all him. But it wasn’t just that, it was what he had said to Sue, what he had said to Jason. Sure, it was to make her life better, but it was precisely what Jason had done to her, precisely what she had asked himnotto do. And he hadn’t listened. He had overridden her, thinkingheknew better.
He’d broken them, and he didn’t know how to fix it.
There was a small whirlwind as Jasmeet flung her coat over the back of one of the uncomfortably high seats and smashed her handbag on the table.
“We’re not staying long,” she announced, Dan following close behind. “If it were up to me, we wouldn’t have come at all.”
He deserved that.
“Thanks Jasmeet, Dan.” He nodded. “Do you want a drink?”
“White wine,” Jasmeet said, positioning herself on the chair.
“Lager,” Dan mumbled, as he took a seat next to her.
They sat in an uncomfortable silence whilst the drinks were brought over.
“So?” Jasmeet said, raising her eyebrows at him. “What do you have to say for yourself? Because I have spent the last few days trying not to let Lila spiral into a grey pit of depression and self-loathing. And that isyourfault.”
Fuck. He passed a hand over his face. God, he was tired.
