Page 105 of Love, Academically
Because there was an ‘us’, he was just unsure how she wanted to frame it.
“No, I haven’t found the right time,” she said.
“What about your parents?”
There was an uncomfortable silence from the other end of the phone.
“I was just wondering,” he said.
Logically he knew that Lila telling people about their official relationship status was a big step, andlogicallyhe was fine with that. It was him she called, him she kissed, him she gave her smiles to. But also, something hot clutched at his stomach. That’s what you did. You told people about your boyfriend. Or whatever she wanted to call him.
Was she not telling people because she was embarrassedof him? There was a moment of disbelief that this beautiful butterfly of a woman would ever want to be with someone like him; highly-strung, set in his ways, poor personal skills. Perhaps she wasn’t telling people because she couldn’t bear people to know that she was with someone likehim.
“Rhys, it’s so difficult to get a word in edgeways with anyone half the time, I haven’t been able to tell anyone,” she said. “Besides, I’m not sure people would be that interested, they’ve got better things to worry about.”
Fucking Jason breaking her down. Fucking Jasmeet and the other one, Maddy, for making her feel less than. Fuck her parents for not seeing how much she needed their attention.
Seren had never been embarrassed by who he was – in fact, she would tell anyone who would listen that she was engaged to the Dallimore heir. But Lila wasn’t Seren, and he never wanted her to be. If it was up to him, he would shout it to anyone who listened, but it wasn’t. He had to be slow and safe for her, and if she needed time to realise that she wasn’t a burden to other people, then he would give it to her, no matter how much he had to push down his feelings of inferiority.
“Lila, you are worthy of people’s time. You are worthy of everything you want.”
The line was silent, apart from a little sniff.
“I can come over, if you’d like?” he asked gently.
“Okay, if you want to.”
“Lila, I always want to.”
“Yeah, I would like that.”
Rhys went all the way round the roundabout and headed for his girlfriend, who was sorely in need of care.
Chapter 17
Indignant(adjective) in·dig·nant
feeling or showing anger because of something unjust or unworthy
Lila
Sue’s office was milky-tea bland. The artwork on the walls looked like someone had vomited abstract lines and circles onto a canvas and entitled it ‘Corporate Art for Offices’. There were no books, just folder upon folder upon folder on her shelves. Where Lila’s smaller office was welcoming and cozy, Sue’s seating area was barely used, demonstrated by yet more folders stacked up on her sofa.
Standing awkwardly in front of Sue’s desk because she hadn’t been invited to sit, was not one of Lila’s favourite pastimes, especially when she was at a loss as to what to say. Dumbfounded was not the word, and Sue didn’t even seem to care as she clicked away on her computer, eyes certainly not on Lila and her imminent breakdown.
“Was there anything else?” Sue peered at her from behind her computer, her mouth pursed together like a cat’s bum.
Was there anything else?
Well, actually Sue, yes there was. That you are a condescending prick who couldn’t manage a conker-finding expedition in the bright depths of autumn? Yes, that was something that shecouldsay. She wouldn’t, but she could.
“No,” Lila choked out.
Sue sighed. “You’re not going to let this affect your work, are you?”
