Page 123 of Of Serpents and Ruins
But Brandt wasn’t here.
Kine continued to stare at the fire before he gave a slow nod. "Well, we have no way to go but forward. There isn’t much to be done now—"
I swallowed hard then stepped forward, interrupting him as I looked to Lorna and Arjax. "You have already done so much for us, and we are all so grateful, but please, I must ask you another favor. Will you come with us? The Gola Resh almost assuredly knows we are going to the Ember Lord's Crest, and we must be prepared for her. If she has started to drain our ability to shift, would—"
"We were already planning on leaving with you, little cousin." Arjax placed the ring back into my hand, his smile warm and gentle.
I turned it over slowly, tears pricking my eyes. "I don’t know how we’ll ever thank you enough for everything."
"You don’t have to. You’re our family. We can’t be with our veskaros or veskares here. We don’t have our cadre, but we have our little cousins and the beasties we’ve taken in." Arjax nudged me with his elbow, almost toppling me. His smile had that sad note to it again, as did Lorna’s.
Kine chuckled. "Were you just going to stowaway or something or surprise us in the morning?"
"Do not underestimate my abilities to hide, baby blue." Lorna patted Kine on the head as she walked past him toward the tree with the carcasses.
"Figured we'd cover that after the party," Arjax said, still smiling. The concern remained apparent on his face, in the wrinkles around his eyes and on his brow. "But there’s no more to be done for the end of Sepeazia tonight. Tonight, we celebrate life. We feast. We dance. We laugh. All right?"
Kine agreed wholeheartedly while Elias nodded, his manner subdued. I forced myself to grin and offered to help.
It felt good in a way to be able to focus in on the preparations for tonight's feast, basic as Arjax and Lorna insisted it would be. The simple work occupied my hands, though my thoughts remained discordant and agitated. Elias rolled logs out to serve as stools and tables. I busied myself gathering herbs and digging roots with Kine while Arjax and Lorna butchered the meat and set it to roast. From there, we chopped up the herbs and mixed them with the salt to rub on some of the meat. The roots were similar to potatoes. We buried them in the embers of one of the fires and left them to cook.
The sun had begun its descent, casting the forest in molten gold by the time the crew arrived. Sen carried a large pot of something steaming and fragrant that resembled the sweet potato chowder from the other night. He beamed when Lorna swept it from his arms and planted a kiss on the top of his head.
The quantity of wine that these two had in casks in the camp probably should not have startled me, especially when I recalled that Vawtrians didn’t drink wine the way we did. Their wine was different, and this wine… Well, it wouldn’t get either Lorna nor Arjax drunk, but they had still kept it for visitors.
The sun soon sank below the horizon, leaving the fire as our only source of golden light. Its smoke rose and snaked out of sight, the air fragrant and rich as the meat roasted on the metalspits. Fat dropped and sizzled in the flames, and the charred scent should have made my stomach rumble.
Soon after, Kine dug out the roots we had buried. They were charred and black on the outside, but they split open to reveal creamy soft goodness inside. I managed a few mouthfuls with sprinklings of fresh herbs, but mostly I just enjoyed how happy everyone seemed. Most everyone seemed able to forget what we were up against and enjoy the reprieve that this little celebration permitted.
Then it was time for the dancing. While more meat roasted, Arjax set up three drums as well as a rattle and called out for volunteers. He soon had them. Cheers followed as two brothers and a sister set the pace for the dance.
What a night.
I wanted to enjoy it. It was good. Arjax and Lorna had blessed us with uncommon kindness. The crew—my crew—reacted to them as if they were family. No one seemed out of place or troubled. You wouldn’t have guessed that in less than two weeks, we would all be dead if we failed in this mission.
And yet, I couldn’t bring myself to smile. Hard as I tried, part of it still felt wrong to me. This celebration too felt familiar, but it was missing pieces. I wanted Brandt’s arms around me, to lean back against his chest and tease him with my hips before prancing off to dance around the fire.
Kine came to stand beside me, arms folded over his broad chest. "You should come dance. Sulking doesn’t fix a thing."
"It doesn't feel right without Brandt," I said with a shrug. The aching pulse within my chest had intensified so much it was like a physical weight. It held me down.
"True, but sitting out here like this won't make it any better. You’ll feel better if you dance. Work out some of the nerves and sorrow." He nudged me with his elbow. He pulled a sour face at me then looked to see if I would smile back.
I only gave him a halfhearted smile in return. "I may go soak in the hot springs and see if I can get the depression off me."
He laughed and held his hands out. "Come on. You can soak in the hot springs after you dance."
The heaviness within me intensified, but Kine was relentless. Gripping both my wrists, he yanked me into the dance circle. My feet staggered into the steps as I remembered, the beat familiar as my own heart. The steady rhythm of the drums guided me. My stiffness eased even if my heartache didn’t, and somehow laughter came as well.
If all dances had purposes and voices, then this one was simply to celebrate being alive. It was madness and play with no instruments except the drums and a rattle and laughter. Some danced with rhythm, some without.
Arjax and Lorna were such show-offs. They transformed in mid-dance, slipping between shapes and varying colors and patterns of flesh and scales and hair and eyes as effortlessly as breathing. Snakes, dragons, eagles, terror birds, gazelles, horses. When they weren’t shifting, they were pounding their feet and slinging anyone around within arm’s reach.
Most of the crew joined in. No one had brought fancy clothes, but a few had brought ribbons. Lorna and Arjax shared their feathers and shells. Half the time Lorna and Arjax danced, the feathers and bits of plants they’d collected fell out of their hair, but they always kept them in when shifting. Probably to show that they could.
With Kine’s encouragement, I let the dance take me. He whooped and grabbed my hands, twirling me around. Lorna seized my other arm then swept me up and spun me out. Someone else caught my arm and guided me back as we stomped and bent and spun.
Everyone danced.
