Page 56 of Of Serpents and Ruins
Leave.
That was all I had to do.
I gripped Brandt's tabard tighter. As I turned, my eyes traced over his sculpted jaw and broad shoulders, desire rising within me like heat from a flame. He'd clenched his eyes shut as if it took all his strength to remain there.
Amid the haziness, a rawness developed. "Being away from you is one of the most painful things in my life," I said.
His jaw tensed. His arms braced as if he was physically fighting himself to stay back.
I wanted to laugh, sob, wail, scream, and dance all at once. All the emotions intensified.
"My whole life on Earth felt wrong," I said, my voice so thick it was hard to speak. "It was…hard. Nothing stable. Nothing solid. Nothing but group homes, shifting dynamics, and longing. Perpetual longing. When I looked in the mirror, even the face that looked back at me was wrong. When I saw you again…everything started to feel right in a deeper way. I found out that I died and was reincarnated, and all of it made sense to me. I’m not even struggling that much to leave Earth behind. And that’s because I look at you, and I know I am in the right place. I am finally where I am me. I am so close to being back exactly where I belong and with the people with whom I belong. And now I have to leave you?"
"I'm sure you found others there in your new life," he growled, his gaze still fixed on the stone. His hands balled into fists. The muscles along his forearms tensed. "And I would not have held it against you. All I want is for you to be all right, even if it is apart from me."
"There's no happiness for me apart from you, Brandt. When I look at you, I am reminded of what I was looking for all the time I was there." I couldn't make myself move away. The fogginess was growing, pulling me in deeper. "I love you."
His jaw tightened. "I love you too, Stella." The words were little more than a growl. "More than anything."
His tortured expression sliced through me.
This was ridiculous. How could anyone demand that I leave him behind? He was my mate.
A week ago, I hadn't even known that I had a mate, but here I was now, incapable of living without him.
I glanced about the chamber once more. The river was narrowest four feet away. I could leave. Yes.
Or…
I ran over and leaped across.
Brandt's eyes widened. The war that raged within him turned to terror and desire. "Stella."
Oh! It was incredible. Just being near him made my blood ignite. I squared my shoulders as I drew in his scent, and I giggled. "Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?"
His eyes widened. "What?"
I swallowed, my cheeks burning. So much for blaming the alcohol, but oh, it felt so good! "You heard me."
He lifted his chin. "Stella…"
The way his cheeks flushed a little bit made my stomach somersault. I edged closer. "Did you sneeze just then? I'd ask God to bless you, but looks like He already did."
He set his jaw. A smile twitched over his lips as he sighed. His cheeks reddened more. "I can't believe you aren't taking this more seriously. I almost killed you last time."
"You might as well be a camera because every time I look at you, I grin."
"This is so inappropriate."
"I'm your wife." I batted my eyelashes at him. "See what I'm wearing? The smile you gave me. Don't you want to wear what I gave you?"
It actually felt good to just go with it. Had it always been this way between us? I felt utterly stupid and entirely entranced and…happy. All I wanted to do was tease him, kiss him, and keep him. Why did he have to be cursed to kill me?
He held up his hand. "Stella…"
"Yes?" I tilted my head. I didn't care how dangerous this was. I didn't care that I might die at any moment. My head spun a little already. It hurt so much to smile, but I couldn't stop. "Iunderstand why you're worried. There's something wrong with my eyes."
"Oh?" He frowned. "What?"
