Page 9 of Reclaiming his Honor
That was a fucking complication of the highest order. He withdrew his cell phone and called Moto, putting the HERO Force computer guru to work researching Mac’s competition. If Turner had any skeletons in his closet, Mac needed their bones for ammunition.
He’d been worried Ellie may have remarried, and if he’d found her already someone else’s wife he would have conceded in hopes she would be happy with her new husband. But a fiancé was competition, not a done deal, and he’d have to be out of his mind to step back for that man. Ellie still had feelings forhim. That was as obvious to Mac as the moon shining in the clear night sky, and he had every intention of winning her love back—Mike Turner be damned.
He made his way over the grassy hill and approached the reception, fast-paced music and golden light spilling from open double doors and hundreds of tiny windows into the warmth of the summer evening. From this vantage point, he could see everyone who mattered. Ellie talking to the DJ. Shonda with her new husband, standing by a table of people he recognized as Ellie’s extended family. Lewis at the bar, laughing with another groomsman, and his sweet little Callie, dancing with someone he didn’t know.
Emotion filled him, overwhelming him in a rush. He didn’t just want to get Ellie back. He wanted his children, too. How many years had he waited to see them again, to be near these people he loved more than any others on earth? The unit of time didn’t matter. It had been an eternity, a span so great he could barely hang on, a moment so elusive he feared he might never experience it. Yet here he was, his wife and children all in sight, the potential of a happy ending finally within reach, and in that moment he thought he might lose it and weep like a baby.
The first notes of “At Last,” rang out, electrifying his nervous system. This had been their song, his and Ellie’s, and for the briefest moment he thought she might have reconsidered his intentions toward her. But then the DJ announced the bride and groom’s first dance together as husband and wife, and Marshall lead Shonda to the middle of the dance floor.
Mac stepped into the room, taking in the sight. Shonda had grown into a breathtakingly beautiful woman, with her mama’s grace of movement and proud countenance. He couldn’t be more pleased. Ellie had clearly done a wonderful job raising her, and a pang of guilt intruded on his happiness.
Ellie. His eyes sought her out in the crowd, finding her alone on the opposite side of the dance floor, her expression saying she, too, was lost in this moment. He longed to go to her and lead her to the dance floor, to hold her in his arms as Marshall was holding Shonda. He made his way to her, his body moving of its own accord, ignoring the certainty of rejection and desperate for his wife. He’d nearly reached her when the DJ suggested everyone join the couple on the dance floor, and Turner appeared out of nowhere.
Mac watched as Ellie accepted his arm with a smile, Mac’s heart wrenching in his chest as another man swept Mac’s beloved wife off her feet.
Bastard.
He shoved his hands in his pockets and scowled.
“Daddy?” He turned to find Callie standing behind him, her amber eyes so much like her mother’s. What was she, fifteen now? She’d been a little kid the last time he’d seen her, always desperate for attention and quick to hug anyone. He could lose himself in all he had lost, and he pushed the regret away to smile at her.
She grinned impishly. “Do you want to dance?”
“I’d love to.” He led her to the dance floor, one hand in hers, the other settling at her waist as they moved to the music. “You’ve grown into an amazing young lady.”
“Thanks.” Her eyes raked over him curiously, and he had the distinct impression she was looking for some physical attribute to compliment. “You look the same.”
He chuckled. “I’m a little more gray.”
“Oh, yeah.” Her eyes went wide. “I didn’t mean—”
“It’s fine. It’s been a long time.”
“I just meant, you feel the same. You know? I remember how you felt.”
“You, too.” Memories of Callie as a toddler filled his mind. She was a handful, that one. In constant motion. So full of love and wild emotion, she would wrap her arms around your leg and refuse to let go one minute, then wail and cry that nobody loved her the next. “I remember you used to come running to the door whenever I came home, as if you hadn’t seen me in years.” As soon as the words were out of his mouth, he longed to stuff them back in.
Her expression seemed to freeze. “I didn’t come running this time.”
“I know. I didn’t mean…” His voice trailed off.I didn’t mean to point out the fact that I’ve been out of your life for most of it. That I’m a terrible father who probably gave you abandonment issues and—
She reached her arms around his neck and pulled him to her in a tight embrace. “But I missed you so much.”
Mac’s heart damn near exploded. He wrapped his arms around his youngest child. She was welcoming him back into her life, no questions asked. The past didn’t matter, as long as he was here now. “I’m sorry, baby-girl,” he said, pushing the words past the knot in his throat. “I missed you, too. So much.”
“I love you, Dad.”
The wave of emotion knocked him off-kilter, and a tear ran down his cheek. He didn’t care that he was crying in front of a hundred people, didn’t care about anything but his daughter in his arms. “I love you, too.” He slowly released her. “More than you could ever know.”
Callie was crying, too, and he wiped at a tear on her cheek. “I wish we could have stayed with you in France,” she said. “I’m so mad at Mama for taking us away.”
He shook his head, remembering the arguments, the way he’d yelled at the children almost every day. He’d hated himself back then, and the realization made him see how far he’d come since moving to New York and working for HERO Force. He wasn’t the same man he’d been during that time. He was better, stronger. But he still had to own who he’d once allowed himself to be. “She was right to do it. I was an awful person to be around. Yelling all the time. Screaming at my wife and children. Blaming everyone for everything that went wrong with my life. I hated myself, and I spread that hatred onto you guys and your mother.”
Her brows drew together. “That’s not what I remember.”
He didn’t want to tell her the truth, didn’t want her to believe it. But he had to. “You thought I walked on water back then. But I was a mean son of a bitch, Callie. I was poison, and your mama knew she had to get you children away. I don’t blame her one bit for that, and you shouldn’t either.”
Mac felt someone watching them, and he looked up to find Lewis glaring at him from just beyond the dance floor, with what looked like a glass of liquor in his hand. Pure hatred shot out from the boy like a laser focused directly on Mac. “Lewis remembers better than you,” he told his daughter.
