Page 42 of A Royal Arrangement
Deep down, Colin knew it was time he opened up to Rosalie about Isabella. If she understood the level of love in his heart for his late wife, maybe it would help her to see why he was struggling to move on.
Before he could change his mind, Colin changed into more casual attire and walked over to the door connecting their rooms, knocking on it. He clasped his hands behind his back, rocking on the balls of his feet as he waited for her to answer.
When Rosalie opened the door, her expression was cautious. She had reason to be. He’d hardly talked to her at dinner tonight, and now he was knocking on her door.
“Is everything all right?” Her eyes widened as she waved him into her room. “Is Addie okay?”
“Addie’s okay. Everything’s fine.” Colin averted his gaze. “I would like to take you up on your offer.”
Rosalie bit her bottom lip. “Can you elaborate on what exactly it is that I offered?”
“I’m ready to share with you about…” His words caught in his throat. He breathed in deeply and exhaled a long sigh. “I’m ready to talk about Isabella.”
She grabbed his hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze, though it didn’t do much to reassure him. Instead, it made his heart pound harder and his mouth turn dry. He straightened his hand, and when she released it, he ran his palm against his jeans, trying to forget how it had felt in Rosalie’s.
“Where would you like to chat?”
Colin raised the linen blanket he had brought with him, hoping she would be agreeable to having this conversation. “I was thinking we could sit on the beach.”
“Then what are we waiting for?” Rosalie walked toward the door that led into the hallway. “Let’s go. I don’t want to miss the sunset,” she called over her shoulder.
Colin offered his arm to her as they walked down the steep pathway lit with small lanterns. When they reached the bottom of the path, he assisted her over the large rocks to reach the palace’s private beach. She clung to him as they made their way across the slippery rocks and let go once they reached the sandy shoreline.
He shook out the white linen blanket and spread it on the sand. They settled on the blanket, facing the perfect view of the setting sun in the distance. It cast a brilliant cascade of orange, pink, and purple hues across the sky just above the ocean.
The view brought with it a bittersweet feeling. The sound of the ocean waves lapping the shore and the salty smell in the air filled him with a sense of peace and calm. But being here brought back the bitter grief of losing Isabella.They’d spent countless evenings in that exact spot, watching the sunset. Most nights, no words had even been exchanged…they weren’t needed. Being together had always been enough.
Until she was gone.
Then he wished for a whole lifetime of conversations with her.
“We spent so many evenings in this exact spot.” Colin ran his hands along the blanket, closing his eyes and imagining Isabella beside him. He could almost feel her hand in his, could almost smell her lilac perfume in the air. “Most of the time, we didn’t say anything at all. We would justbetogether.”
Rosalie reached over and intertwined her fingers with his. This time, he didn’t bother to pull away. He needed the silent strength her touch offered. Her hand in his grounded him, whether he wanted it to or not.
“Isabella was my better half. Our parents introduced us when we were both twenty-two, and we were inseparable after that. We got engaged a year after we met and married a few months after that. A year and a half later, Addie came along. Then I lost my dad and became king of Edgemont, and…well, you know what happened next.” He paused to take a slow breath. “One day, Isabella was here, snuggling our two-month-old daughter before she put her to bed, and the next, she was gone. All it took was one person running a red light to end her life. I think that’s why I’ve had such a hard time moving on. She was taken from us so suddenly that I didn’t have a chance to say goodbye or tell her I loved her one last time.”
Rosalie started running her thumb across his. He focused on her touch instead of the pang of sadness that filled him.She remained silent, giving him the space to share in his own time.
He rubbed at his chin, focusing on the feeling of the scruff under his fingers instead of the sadness that threatened to consume him. “We had our similarities—she was serious and stubborn. But Isabella was so many things I’m not. She was gracious and always put others before herself. She sang Addie the same song every night as she rocked her to sleep. She brought me a cup of my favorite tea every time I had a late night. Like I said, she was my better half.”
“She sounds wonderful.”
“She is.” He withdrew his hand from Rosalie’s and pressed his lips firmly together before correcting himself. “She was.”
Colin lay back on his elbow and rested his head in his palm.
Rosalie matched his stance. “Tell me more about her.”
He shared story after story until the sun had almost fully set, coating them in a cover of darkness. Colin felt mixed emotions swirling inside of him. His heart was raw from having been so vulnerable and sharing something henevertalked about, but he also felt a little bit more at peace since he was no longer the only one bearing the weight of his heavy feelings.
“You mentioned losing your dad the same year as you lost Isabella, but you didn’t tell me about when you lost your mom. Do you mind sharing about her?” Rosalie asked.
“We lost her when I was six.” Colin looked out into the darkness, getting lost in the rhythmic sound of the lapping waves as he tried to figure out what to share about his mother. “I barely remember her now. My father would tell me stories about trips we took together or things she did or said, and I would pretend to remember, because I didn’twant him to be sad that I didn’t. I think having lost my mom so young is part of why Isabella’s death hit me even harder. Of course it would be devastating for anyone to lose their spouse, but losing her so young and knowing Addie would never truly know her mom, just like I hadn’t known mine, really hit me hard. I wasn’t just grieving everything I wouldn’t have with her for the rest of our lives; I was also grieving everything Addie wouldn’t get to experience with her.”
“I really wish I had known both your mom and Isabella, and I’m so sorry they’re not here. It’s not fair. Life’s not fair. But you have all your memories with Isabella and the stories your father told you about your mother, and we have the opportunity to make sure those memories live on. Whenever you want to talk about either of them or share stories about them with Addie, I’m here to support you in that.” Rosalie scooted close and wrapped her arm around his waist, giving him a reassuring hug.
“Thanks,” he said—because it was the only word he could muster. After a few more minutes passed, his breathing slowed to normal, his emotions finally at bay. “We should probably head back inside.”
