Page 104 of Our Long Days
She almost did. I almost gave up, afraid of the trek, when at the summit, my wildest dreams were waiting.
It’s not the mountain we conquer, but ourselves.
This is my peak.
Etched into my soul, my love for Florence is more permanent than any tattoo.
Florence is a restless sleeper,and once she’s awake, she’s awake.
Right now, the comforter is being dragged over my stomach, stopping just above my waist as she traces the words along my ribs.
“Morning,” I grunt.
“Good morning.” She smiles, eyes on her task.
God, she’s beautiful like this—hair messy from my hands, eyes hazy with sleep, in my shirt.
I blink.
“Is that…” I pinch the edge of the black and yellow flannel.
“It might be.”
She squeaks when I drag her on top of me.
“When did you even change into this?”
“There were a pair of Blue Jays singing outside the window, so I went to check on the boys and got changed. I think it looks better on me anyway.”
I stroke a hand down the length of her spine, enjoying the feel of the soft material as I cup her ass. “You won’t hear me arguing.”
We stare at each other, her chin on my chest. As much as last night was a huge step, there are questions I can tell she wants to ask. It’s something I’ll have to get used to. Already, less than twelve hours later, the void between us has closed.
She’s proud to be with me. The shame was all mine, my feelings tainted by the uncertainty surrounding my condition. She didn’t coddle me or sugar coat it. Deafness is a possibility, but at the knowledge I don’t have to face it alone, the fear dims.
That’s what she does. Brightens. Shines. Glows. My personal ray of light.
“I owe you a better explanation than the one I gave last night,” I start. “My intent was never to keep things from you because I didn’t trust you. It was to protect you, and I guess myself.”
Her lips corkscrew. “I understand your fears, but anyone who walks away from a person they claim to love because of something they can’t control… Well, that isn’t love.”
“I don’t regret those years alone.” I palm the back of her head. “Not if it led me here.”
She draws shapes on my pecs. “I’m guilty of not sharing certain details myself, but if this is real, Dex, we both need to start fresh. No more secrets.”
“No more secrets,” I agree.
There’s a hesitancy to her next words. “You need to take better care of yourself. Less coffee. Low sodium. When was the last time you saw your doctor?”
My skin prickles when I tell her about my last appointment with Doctor Accetta and the follow-up I’m yet to arrange, about my worst attacks and how my hearing aid is helpful but also a hindrance. Not once does she waver. And when I recount the silent vow I made almost twenty years ago, her love embraces me.
A sob rips from Florence’s lips as she buries her face in my chest.
“Baby, please don’t cry.” I rub circles between her shoulder blades. “C’mon, look at me.”
Her eyes shine bright with tears. “Dex, you break that vow right now. You’re not doing this alone. I promise, I’m here for the long haul.”
I press a gentle kiss to her lips, swiping at her wet cheeks. Her empathy and compassion are some of my favorite things. “Trouble, the vow broke when you stole this flannel. I just didn’t know it.”
