Page 43 of Power
“Right, I got that.” Dakota leaned closer, her voice dropping. “But this is you we’re talking about. You don’t date people.”
“I didn’t say I was going to date him,” I protested, though my heart wanted to punch me for it. “I just said it was the first time I was ever considering it.”
“Which for you”—she snorted—“is as big of a deal as if you showed up here, wearing an engagement ring.”
“Please.” I rolled my eyes. “You think I’ll ever get married?”
“Maybe you’ll change your mind.”
“I highly doubt that.” I smoothed my skirt for the tenth time since we’d gotten down here. “A marriage is a legally bindingagreement, and the vows, I’m pretty sure, say something along the lines of love, honor, and ‘OBEY.’” I made air quotes aroundobey. “As if I would ever agree to that.”
“I’m pretty sure most wedding vows are more modernized these days.”
“Not the point.” I drummed my fingers on my coffee cup. “Not getting into a legally binding agreement with a man.”
“Remind me why you don’t want a happily ever after with someone?” Dakota asked. Though I couldn’t tell if she was asking sincerely or asking in that way friends did when they were trying to get you to see something in a different light. “From what you’ve told me, you’ve encouraged your friend Tessa to be with that Blake guy, so you must not be against relationships in general. But you’re against them for you?”
I worked my lower lip between my teeth.
“Do you think you’re not deserving or something?” she questioned.
“That’s not it at all,” I assured. Self-worth wasn’t the issue. “It’s a power thing. Dating gives a man power over me, and I refuse to give anyone that power.”
“Power?” Dakota’s worry line appeared between her brows as if my profession alone caused that wrinkle. After a few seconds, she waved her hand dismissively. “Okay, forget weddings. Let’s get back to the point at hand. You had a fantastic weekend, he gave you his number, and you’re thinking about calling him?”
“A little.” The admission felt like pulling teeth, but calling him again didn’t mean officially dating, right? Maybe we could find a way to spend time together, like we had this weekend, without it being a thing?
“Wow.” She raised an eyebrow. “So, what makes this guy so worthy?”
I chewed my lip, considering. “He’s incredibly disarming. Like, this weekend, at first, I thought he wasn’t used to giving up control. That was the total vibe I was getting. I mean, he basically said as much.” The memory of his fingers tracing my skinflashed through my mind. “But maybe he just wanted me to think he was in control at first because that’s what most women go for. And he didn’t realize that power was a complete turnoff.”
But once he did realize it was a hard limit for me, he handed that control over without question. That one act said everything. He was confident enough to surrender the reins while respecting me enough to do it willingly.
“You know,” Dakota said carefully, “power doesn’t mean controlling. Not all guys are like your dad, Scarlett.”
My cheeks burned. I could tell she regretted the words the instant they left her mouth. I didn’t know why I shared so much about my past when Dakota was so guarded about hers. Hell, I felt like I knew everything about her life except the fundamentals. I was pretty sure she had a brother based on some comments, but there was something dark and twisty behind that relationship.
It was strange how you could know virtually everything about someone, know what made them tick, finish their sentences, and yet have huge gaps in their history. And more importantly, not know why they kept it hidden from everyone. Including you.
Then again, look at me. I’d only told her the broad strokes of my father. Abusive. Controlling. I’d never told her about specific examples. Like how he took Mom’s keys the day she was sick so she couldn’t go to the doctor. Or how he’d steal her wallet so she’d have no money. Or how he’d sometimes use a shoe to beat her. A boot, to be exact.
“Sorry.” Dakota winced. “I didn’t mean to bring up your dad.”
“No, it’s okay.” I forced a smile. “You’re right. I’m well aware of what land mines he planted in my psyche.”
“So, back to Prince Charming.” Her eyes sparkled with mischief. “If he’s this unassuming guy, maybe heissomeone you can explore a relationship with?”
“Maybe,” I admitted, fidgeting with my badge. “I don’t know. He’s just … different. Not trying to impress me or control the situation. Like this weekend, when I insisted we go horseback riding, he went even though it was the last thing he wanted to do.”
I smiled despite myself, remembering how he’d looked up at me from the ground after falling off on the ride back.
“It was kind of nice, you know? Just being equals.”
Because in the limited experience I’d had with dating, watching some relatives navigate relationships, not to mention my parents, there seemed to be an inherent power struggle that, all too often, favored men.
But with Jace, that power dynamic hadn’t been there at all.
“Speaking of power,” Dakota whispered, glancing around, “what time is your meeting with HR?”
