Page 70 of Loving the Sinner
I should be offended by what she’s saying, implying Izzy and I are just having a “rebellious phase.” But it’s a valid concern from a mom and a caregiver that I can’t seem to be too upset.
“I understand your concerns, Jess. And I admire your protectiveness over not only Luke, but Wes, too. I love Wes. He’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me. I’ve left being Mormon behind, for various reasons, and he’s helped me learn to be who I am without it. As for Izzy, well, she’s a stubborn soul. She’s doing her own research about the church to see if it’s something she wants to stay in, but I can tell you she loves your son. That girl could charm the scales off of a crocodile if she wanted to, but she’s been completely faithful to Luke this last year. I would know, since I shared a room with her and heardwaytoo many things I shouldn’t have.” I shudder thinking about all the cringy things I had to experience.
Jess nods in agreement, “Yeah. They’re pretty gross in love, aren’t they? I usually put headphones in when they’re talking so I don’t gag.”
I laugh, the tension in Jess’s shoulders easing having gotten that off her chest. I’m glad I could put her mind at ease with not only Wes, but Luke too.
“Well Elli, we do pizza nights once a month with just Wes, Luke, and I where we catch up on things we don’t want Claudia and Ernie to know, so I’ll have to get your favorite pizza toppings before our next one. Welcome to our mixed up little family.” She pulls me in for a hug, and tears spring to my eyes at the gesture.
Sure, my mother used to hug me, but it was all surface level. It was never a comforting embrace where you feel safe and protected like Jess’s hug is.
Even if my family doesn’t really want anything to do with me, I’ve found my own little family instead. One where I don’t have to hide parts of myself for their approval.
Chapter 33
Wes
Seeing Jess hug Elli, and having everyone important in my life accept and welcome her with open arms makes my heart want to burst out of my fucking chest.
I know I need to stop comparing my relationship with Elli to my relationship with Shelby but the difference is night and day and I want to kick myself for ever wasting my time with a girl like Shelby.
Not that I ever imagined I’d have a girl like Elli.
Who would have thought that the sweet, good, Mormon girl would end up with a ruffian like me?
Jess comes into the kitchen where I’m drying the dishes, a smile on her face. She sidles up to me, nudging me with her hip.
“She’s a good one, Wes. I can see why you’ve fallen so fast for her.”
“Thanks Jess. I would’ve kept seeing her even if you didn’t like her, but knowing you do makes it better.” I say.
Jess puts her hand on my arm to stop my drying, and I look over and meet her gaze, which is a little glassy.
“Your grams and your mom would love her. She would have Joyce wrapped around her finger in an instant and if things ever ended, you know she’d bug you about Elli for the rest of her days.” I laugh at that. It’s true, Grams was a hardass about me keeping good things in my life, and Elli is the best thing.
Jess clears her throat, then continues. “I was a little harsh with her back there, because I needed to know she wasn’t going to just play around with your heart. She didn’t even flinch. She reassured me that her intentions with you are pure, and that she loves you.”
My heart can’t take any more bursting or it’s just going to stop beating all together. I know Elli said she loved me earlier, but to hear her admit it to someone else makes me want to rip her away from everyone and show her just how much that means to me.
“I love her too, in case that wasn’t glaringly obvious.” I mumble.
Jess pats me lovingly, but condescendingly on the back, “I know you do. I could see it when you got your haircut. I could feel it in the song you wrote for her. You’re not subtle, son.”
I roll my eyes which makes her laugh.
“Now I know you don’t want to spend all day surrounded by us since you’re deep in the honeymoon phase. Go. Take your girl home and… ugh I don’t want to know what you do but just go be together.”
I lean over and give Jess a kiss on the cheek. “Thanks Jess. We’ll be over for pizza on Friday. Love you!”
“Love you too!” She shouts back as I speed walk through the kitchen doors and make a beeline for Elli,who’s laughing with Claudia and Ernie about something.
God, I love her laugh. Her smile. I love that she’s so effortlessly integrated into my family.
Elli turns her head and our eyes meet, and the amount of love I see there nearly brings me to my knees.
“Hi babe. How did the dishes go?” She asks.
“Good, uh, they’re done. We have that thing we need to get to, so we should probably get going.”
