Page 58 of Loving the Sinner
Wes:Good morning gorgeous. I hope you slept well. I had so much fun yesterday. Just wanted you to know I’m thinking about you. Xoxo
Waking up to a text from Wes after having the best orgasm, best first date, best day ever makes me giggle and kick my feet. I feel like I’m floating as I go through my morning routine and get ready for the day.
I’m in the middle of making breakfast when my mom calls on Facetime. I check what I’m wearing, and when I realize I’m in a tiny crop top that shows the hickey Wes gave me last night, I hurry and throw on a t-shirt before answering.
I paste on a smile. “Hey, Mom.”
“Elliana.” She says curtly. “We haven’t heard from you in a while.”
Well, the phone works both ways as you always say.
“Sorry, I’ve been super busy with work and settling in. Izzy’s called me a few times. She said Spence got his mission call to Brazil. That’s exciting.”
Mom’s eyes glow with warmth for her favorite son. I know it, she knows it, everyone knows Spencer is her favorite. Her golden child. Her voice is much warmer now that I’ve brought him up. “Yes, we’re so proud of him and his decision to serve. That’s actually why I’m calling you. I wanted to see if you were going to make it out for his farewell? You know he’s your first sibling to go on a mission. It would look bad if you were to miss it.”
Wow. Two minutes in and she’s already guilt-tripping me. Splendid. I just manage to stop my eyes from rolling while I respond.
“Yes, I planned on coming. I’m going to be bringing…” A friend? My boyfriend? What do I call Wes? “Wes. Someone I’ve gotten close to while I’ve been here.”
Mom’s eyebrow raises, and she doesn't look pleased. “I hope you won’t be bringing yourfriendto stay here while you’re here. You know we don’t have the extra room.”
“I know, Mom. I figured we’d just stay at a hotel.”
“We?Is this Wes a boy or a girl?”
“He’s a boy. I’m not just going to abandon him to stay alone while I stay at your house.”
That’s the first time I haven’t called my childhood house “home.” It’s a stark realization that I don't consider it home anymore. Did it ever feel like home?
“Elliana,” she sighs, disappointment evident in her tone. “You know what people will say if they realizeyou’re shacking up with a man when you’re unmarried. Besides, what will Packer think?”
“Packer lost the right to think anything about me when he broke up with me and married someone else two months later.” I grit out. How dare she bring up my ex of almost a year right now? He’smarriedand expecting a fucking child last I heard.
“Well what about your sister? What kind of example are you setting for her?” Mom presses.
“Izzy is almost an adult, Mom. She’s not going to base her choices on anyone but herself and you know it. I understand this is probably going to disappoint you and dad, but I’m an adult too. And I’ve made my decisions. I lo-I like Wes a lot. He’s been nothing but kind to me. If you don’t want him there, then that’s fine but I’d rather you say that then try to guilt me into not bringing him.”
The thought of facing my family without Wes there makes me want to throw up. I know I shouldn't be so dependent on someone, and I know Izzy has my back, but I’ve never done well with family gatherings. The thought of having to sit through another one alone…
Mom sighs again, clearly frustrated and angry. “Fine. Bring Wes. But don’t tell anyone you’re staying in a hotel alone with him. You’re right about me and your father being disappointed in you, Elliana. We raised you better than this. Have you even been going to church since you moved?”
“No. I haven’t.”
“So you just want to tear apart our eternal family? That’s what you want? Do you hate us that much?” Tears start welling in her eyes. Of course, the only emotional reaction would be about her precious eternal family. A show of compliance, not love.
“It’s not about you. Or dad. Or anyone but me. I don’t believe in the church anymore. I haven’t for a while.”
“Well. I’m glad to know I raised such a selfish child. I have to go, I have church meetings to attend. I’ll see you in August.”
And then she hangs up.
Frustrated tears well in my eyes and spill over even as I try to blink them away. I hate when she does the passive aggressive “I’m such a bad mom” thing. It’s not fair for her to turn my choices against me like that. Needing some comfort, I do the only thing I can think of.
I text Wes.
Elli:Morning, handsome. I wish I woke up next to you. Any chance you’re free today? I could use a distraction.
His response is almost immediate.
