Page 162 of Red Flag
But it was mine. The only thing I’d always had, even if it hadn’t felt like it. Even if silence had once been a comfort.
“Then a photo of him and a woman in bed was published,” I said, voice cracking. “A woman who was not his wife, but me. And I hadn’t been sure what happened — but then I knew. Then I knew. The day of my dad’s funeral, he came to supportme. And that night, I blacked out. I was completely fine until one drink where I wasn’t. I don’t know if I was drugged. I’ve struggled to drink anything since. I’ve had crippling panic attacks at the thought of drinking something I haven’t seen made. I didn’t know until that picture came out that he’d definitely raped me. I didn’t want to believe it.
“That picture, as you all know by now, was released by SamanthaGarvs, his wife. But it wasn’t just a picture. It was from a video. A video that has been sent to the editor of The Running Post and the police today. I will no longer remain silent. I will no longer cower. I will no longer be a victim. I’m a sexual abusesurvivor.”
I told my story. I spoke aboutVinny, about that night, about how I’d denied it for so long. About how I realised, about how I sought help. About the trial. About the information leaking. About how I knew I wasn’t the only one. About how trusting Nix had helped me, about how I would help myself.
“My whole career, I’ve thought of reputation as everything,” I said with a little nod. “But it’s not. It’s really not. Reputation is for those who don’t know you. Those who don’t know me are going to think I’m a liar, and some are going to think me a clout chaser. But what I’ve learned is that it doesn’t matter. You can think what you want. The people I love know me and they know the truth, as you do now.”
I’d planned on letting it go. It’s what I would have told my client.
If I hadn’t been contacted by three other women saying the same thing aboutVinny. If Nix hadn’t told me there were other women he’d recorded on the hard drive.
Women who maybe weren’t certain, like I hadn’t been.
Women who deserved to know. To have the opportunity to.
Pen lid in my mouth, I scribbled notes on the time stamps where I needed to edit, cradling a now cold cup of tea in one hand.
Writing it was hard. Speaking it was a relief.
Titling it? Impossible.
When I looked up to consider the syntax of a possibility, I noticed Nix leaning against the wall, ankles crossed, as he watched me with a soft smile.
“What?” I asked around the pen lid before removing it.
His eyes smiled. “You seem… focused. In your element. Happy.”
He was the one who had taken the video to the police. His brother had taken all ofVinny’stechnology to a storage facility he had owned before his death.
When the officers asked, we’d been sent the videos ‘anonymously’. It was enough evidence for them to search every address associated with my ex-boss.
For the other women to find the videos.
“I am happy,” I said. “I can’t tell you what a relief I feel and it’s not even out there yet.” I jerked my head in the direction of our bedroom. “Have you packed?”
He shook his head and took my mug from me before placing it on the table.
“Our flight is early,” I warned him with a shake of my head.
Nix sat beside me. “I don’t know if we should go.”
“I think we should definitely go,” I said with a decisive nod. “It’s the last race of the season, Nixon.”
“This could go badly,” he mumbled and gestured to my phone.
“And, if it does, someone might spit on me again,” I said with a laugh that Nix only raised his brows at. “Butwe have security. I’ll stay in the hotel if this doesn’t go well.”
He nodded and glanced over at my notebook.
“Now all that’s left is to tellCris,” I told him.
He breathed in deeply. “I know.”
He got us both another cup of tea, I moved to the sofa and he started to watch videos of the weekend’s track in Florida.
And I sat up straight, ready to callCris.
