Page 39 of Marcellus: House of Drakos
“I didn’t want to be alone,” she blurted out.
Marcellus looked over at her when she made that statement. When he saw the anguish in her big, beautiful eyes, he turned onto his side. He began what she saw as himdissecting her once again, with his soft, knowing eyes giving her the sense that he was keenly aware of her anxiety.
“And you may not believe it by the fact that I’m in your bed like this,” she added, “but I’m not that kind of girl. But after seeing what happened to Niko, I didn’t want to be alone.”
He still had his arm around her waist, which gave her a feeling of protection she never felt before in her life except the other time she was laying with him.
He continued to stare at her as if he was processing what she’d just said. Then with his free hand he took her bang and slid it sideways across her forehead. “Neither did I,” he shocked her by saying. “I never do.”
Savannah had not expected him to be candid with her about something so personal. “You never like to be alone either?”
“That’s correct. Most people think I’m a loner by nature. But I’m not. That’s not what’s worrying me.”
Savannah didn’t understand. “You mean you’re worried about Niko?”
“Of course I’m worried about him. But I can’t do anything about that until they tell me what they want in exchange for him. But that’s not what I meant. I have a confession.”
Savannah found that an even odder thing to say. “What?” she asked him.
“When you first walked into my parlor, I behaved as if I didn’t remember you.” He stared into her eyes. “But I’ve never forgotten you.”
Savannah stared back at him. “It took me a minute, but I knew you remembered.”
Marcellus smiled. Then he actually laughed. “Why do I ever question your perceptiveness?”
Savannah smiled too. Then they both thought about Niko, and the gaiety left.
After a few minutes of silence, she spoke again. “So you don’t like to be alone hun?”
“That’s correct.”
“Why?”
Marcellus was unaccustomed to anybody questioning his reasoning. Especially on such a personal matter. So personal that he was inwardly shocked that he had conveyed it to her at all. “Ever since I was a young man growing up in France, struggling to find my own identity, nightfall always got to me. Whenever the night came, that loneliness that was my friend during the day became my archenemy. Many times I had nowhere to lay my head. Many times I had to look out for my mother until she died. It was difficult. I always preferred a warm body beside me to remind me that I wasn’t so alone in this world.”
“A specific warm body,” Savannah asked, “or anybodywould do?”
What a perceptive question, Marcellus thought. He gave a weak but effectual smile. He slid her bang sideways again. “Any would do,” he admitted to her.
To his surprise, he didn’t see judgement in her eyes. Just understanding. “I guess I’m the exact opposite. When I was working, whenever I made it home, it was only then did I feel at peace. Okay, now I can exhale. Now I can get some much-needed rest. But during the day, when I’m working all day long and half the night with problem after problem, and I’m forced to be around so many vain young models and designers with their outsized egos, that was when I felt the most alone. That’s when I wanted somebody to hold me, to touch me, to make me feel like I’m worth more than a robot on this earth to put out this fire, or contact this designer, or let this person see the boss while that person can’t, or make sure venues are booked and appointmentsare kept, and egos are massaged, and on and on and on. It was a tough job.”
“But you loved it.”
She nodded. “I loved it. It just didn’t love me.”
Marcellus stared at her. “Why did you leave that morning?”
Savannah hesitated. But she knew what he meant. Then she let out a long exhale. “My mother died.”
Marcellus’s eyes stretched. “She did?”
“She was in a car accident. By the time I got to the hospital, she was already gone. It was a tough loss.”
“Why didn’t you call me? I could have been there with you.”
But Savannah was shaking her head. “No, you couldn’t. I wouldn’t have let you in. I was kind of mad at the world when I didn’t even get a chance to say goodbye. I needed time away from everybody.”
“I went to your apartment, but a man answered the door.” Marcellus said it casually, but he looked at her intensely.
