Page 30 of Christmas at Hollybush Farm
Where did the time go? What have I done with it? Well, apart from the obvious – went travelling, got a job, settled down with the wrong man … I’ve blinked and it’s gone. And now … Now it may all go, if we sell off Gramps’s field. What will be next? The rest of the farm. And the house will become a second home for people wanting to get out of the city. I’m sure Llew Griffiths will have contacts for that too. And no one will know where this place is and what a thriving community there used to be.
The girls are at the counter as Mae slips behind it to microwave pizzas and warm up rubbery burgers. I slide down in my chair, hoping they won’t recognize me. I’m hardly seen on the screen, just the edge of my face. I listen to them banter.
‘I think it’s sad. I wouldn’t do it!’ says the one who ordered the burger.
‘It’s a brutal job.’
‘And lonely.’
‘Can’t wait to get to uni,’ says the first. ‘Away from this place.’
‘I think it’s cool,’ says another. ‘But doubt there’ll be any jobs in farming by the time I leave.’
‘Nothing that pays you enough to live off anyway,’ says another.
‘New Zealand! That’s the place to go for farming.’
‘Or Australia!’
‘Christmas on the beach!’
‘Got to be better than here!’
I slide down further. I listen to the clack of Evie’s knitting needles, feeling sad for the place this once was. These young people don’t want to stay here. They don’t have dreams that include this place. I didn’t. I was so keen to prove I could make something of myself. So keen to do as Dad suggested and move away, like Mum did, to make him proud. But do I have dreams for this place now? I know I don’t want our fields to become a solar farm. I know I don’t want Dad to sell up. But what do I want? If I want to save the farm, where does that leave me and Matthew? Would he ever join me here? I know the answer to that. Matthew and my bosses are expecting me in Seattle in the new year. I have to work out a plan between now and then to save the farm and leave it in safe hands.
The door of the café opens, letting in a cold blast and the young, brave-against-the-cold girls, no coats, short skirts, nose piercings and colourful hair, leave, talking of life on the other side of the world where everything, apparently, is much better than it is here, from wages to jobs and weekend beach parties. They’ve seen it on the internet. Suddenly I feel very old, as if the world has passed me by. I’ve seen it allfrom the inside of hotel reception areas and guest suites, and in helping to create an idea of paradise I’d forgotten what I’d left behind. Maybe paradise was once here too.
The door opens and my past walks into the café. ‘Hi.’ Owen raises a hand and smiles. ‘Hi,’ he says to Mae. ‘Can I take a jacket spud? I’ll settle my account soon. Going to pick up some money for grass-cutting I’m still owed from the end of the summer. Some of the second-home owners are here and I’ll be back with cash.’
‘No worries. Oh, actually’ – she grimaces – ‘the boss is coming down tomorrow to check things over. Would be great if you could pay me before then.’
I see him dip his head.
‘Really. I’m owed some money. I’ll get it to you,’ he promises. ‘Thank you for letting me owe it.’
Mae’s face creases. ‘I hate to ask. I know how hard things are right now,’ she says.
‘For all of us,’ he says. ‘I know things are for you too. Can’t be easy, this close to Christmas.’
She shrugs … her armour against the world. ‘It’s okay. I’ll get by.’
‘If there’s anything I can do to help, you know where I am.’ He’s always there to help others.
‘Thank you,’ she says. ‘I know. We seem to be a small group still looking out for each other around here.’ She hands him the jacket potato wrapped in foil.
He thanks her again and goes to leave, then turns back. ‘I’ll see you in the morning, with the money I owe. I promise.’
‘I know you will. No worries.’
Then he turns to me and stops. ‘Great post on Instagram. Bloody brilliant!’ It’s a smile that looks like it hasn’t seen the light of day recently.
‘I just wanted to get some things off my chest. Maybe should have come here instead!’ I try to hide my embarrassment behind the mug of tea Mae has put in front of me. ‘Not sure what I was thinking of, to be honest.’
‘Well, you certainly said what a lot of us are thinking,’ he says. ‘Well done.’
I hear a single bark from outside.
‘Jess is waiting for me!’ he says. His brown and white collie is in the front of his battered truck and I wonder if the food he’s carrying is for himself or for her.
