Page 48 of Love In Provence
And suddenly I want to cry. But I won’t. I’ve cried enough. I can’t believe any of this is happening.
‘So, here’s the thing,’ I start, just as Stephanie arrives carrying little Louis on her hip. He holds out his arms to me. I take him from her, and Tomas hugs me. She kisses me on both cheeks. I clear my throat and wish I’d talked to her about this but now I’vestarted I need to carry on. Everyone is looking at me, waiting.
‘So …’ My palms sweat and I place Louis on the floor. He immediately hugs Ralph instead. ‘As you know, things have changed since you all arrived here.’ I feel hot, light-headed, sick.
‘I was running the bistro, Henri’s, but with Henri’s recent death, and his son arriving to take over the building, it looks like I’m out of a job for the time being.’ My mind is whirring. Where will I find another? I’m not qualified to do anything else here. ‘I don’t have any income right now, and won’t until the lavender starts to sell at the market. Offering to have you all here and feed you in return for your work on the harvest is proving …’ I clear my throat, ‘… problematic. So, I’m afraid I’m going to have to let you all go.’
‘Oh, no!’ There’s a universal cry of dismay.
‘I’m so sorry.’ There’s a lump in my throat. I take a big swig of coffee.
Marco shrugs and Maria glares at him.
‘Well, it was nice, but I can’t wait to get to the coast!’ He smiles widely.
‘Marco, I thought you said you were happy for me to come here, find my roots, what I was looking for?’
‘Yes, but, Mar, that was when I thought we were going to be sunning it in St-Tropez, watching football in Barcelona, or drinking beer in Rome. You’re the onewith the permanently itchy feet, trying to work out where you came from!’
I see her eyes smart. She tosses back her dark hair and sniffs, looking upwards, then back at me. ‘It’s complicated,’ she says. ‘I’m complicated. I just … This trip was about taking some time off from work. I sort of—’
‘Went doolally!’ Marco laughs. No one else does.
‘I was burned out,’ she says quietly. ‘I gave up my business. I’d become just about the business and nothing else.’
‘What was it?’ I ask.
‘Holiday lets. Running them, advertising them, dealing with the owners and the renters. It was a lot.’
‘So you sold the business?’
She nods.
‘Some mug paid well over the odds,’ Marco interjects.
I’m already feeling prickly towards him this morning.
‘We’re on our way to Italy to see if I can feel that’s where I’m supposed to be in life, if that’s where my roots are. My true home.’
‘We don’t have anything other than an empty nest to go home to,’ says Keith.
‘I still need a new clutch,’ says Jen. ‘Don’t think the van’s going anywhere. Bit like my life in it – looks idyllic on the outside, but knackered and miserable under the bonnet!’
They all laugh.
Then Maria speaks. She may have sold her business but her business brain hasn’t left her.
‘We could do what the mayor suggested and start a supper club,’ says Maria. ‘We all pitch in and cover the bills with the money we make.’
There’s agreement around the table.
‘Oh, I don’t know,’ I say. ‘I couldn’t let you do that.’
‘Why not? It’s not like any of us have anywhere we’re rushing to.’
Ed agrees. ‘I’m happy to stay on here as long as I can. Last thing I want is to have to go back and start working at the law firm.’
‘Isn’t that what you’ve always wanted to do?’ asks Graham.
