Page 78 of My Lemon Grove Summer
‘They didn’t really like them,’ she says quietly.
‘That’s not all of them. Where are the rest?’ I say urgently.
Looking ashamed, she lifts the roof of the henhouse. It is stuffed with fruit, the hens perched and pooping on top of them.
‘I couldn’t get any more in, so I . . .’
‘Yes, Valerie?’ I’m slowly realising there isn’t going to be any hope of saving the verdello now.
‘Before you were all up, I drove further up the hill, towards Etna, where it turns into a blackened moonscape, and . . .’
‘Yes,’ I press.
‘I stopped at one of the tourist vantage points and threw them down the hillside.’
She drops her head in what I’m hoping might be shame. As she does, a single verdello drops from the heap, making one of the hens squawk in surprise, and rolls out of the henhouse towards us, followed by another. It’s as if they’re handing themselves in.
Everyone is standing staring at the ruined fruit.
I’m shaking, not just because of the cold, the wet clothes clinging to my body, but from utter betrayal. I feel frozen to the core of my body, despite the sun attempting to come out and warm things up.
‘Mum! What on earth have you done?’ Lennie finally speaks as we all take in what has happened.
Lennie guides me back to our room and turns on the shower, laying out a clean towel for me. And as I step out of it, there is a hot coffee waiting on the bedside table. I am in shock. But I know that no matter what his mother has done, I can always rely on Lennie.
I take the coffee and go and stand by the window, pushing back the flaking shutters and staring over the lemon grove up towards Etna, where my verdello lie in an ashen grave. To the right, Città d’Oro looks like a terracotta toy town tumbling down towards the sea, where the tunnels lead to. Where anything could have happened earlier today. Because of Valerie.
Valerie, I repeat to myself. Of all people. The woman who took me in, made me feel I had a home. Always insisted I had tea and toast before I went out in the morning and always said goodnight before I went to sleep at night. The woman who made me feel safe. And then today put me in my worst nightmare. In a tunnel, with a young girl, reminding me of the awful nights I hid in my cupboard, too scared of the chaos going on around me to come out.
I take a slug of coffee and realise Lennie has put something strong in there, probably for the shock. The shock of discovering that the one woman I thought I could rely on in life is the one who has let me down; and not just let me down, but tried to ruin everything. I feel absolutely lost. I thought coming here was going to be a fresh start, a new beginning; that I had finally made a sensible decision and was working at making a life for myself and joining the club of happily marrieds with homes and businesses.
I wipe away the tears rolling down my face. It’s not the first time I’ve felt let down by the people I thought were meant to love me. And at least I still have Lennie, I think as I look away from the view and at the dry clothes he’s laid out on the bed. We have each other and I know he won’t let me down. Or will he? I would never have believed Valerie would. It suddenly feels like I’m walking on soft sand.
I dress and splash my face with cold water, and then, slowly and as calmly as my jittery body and mind will let me, I make my way downstairs, where the whole house has gathered.
‘Oh Zelda!’ Valerie gets to her feet. She’s clearly been crying, and the rest of the house are standing round her, hands on her shoulders. I feel my own shoulders stiffen. They may have forgiven her, but I haven’t. I stand and stare at her. The face that has meant so much to me.
‘Please, love, let me explain. I’ve been so stupid.’ She goes to take my hand, but I drop it limply by my side.
Lennie steps forward, tall and reassuring, and I allow him to lead me to the kitchen table, my face set. Luca is there, but I don’t look at him. I can’t look at him. Every time I do, my stomach feels like a merry-go-round and my heart starts beating at twice its usual speed. Perhaps it is a good thing we’re leaving, because I can’t be around him feeling like this.
I keep my eyes away from him. Whatever it is that makes him have this effect on me, I have to put a stop to it. Maybe this has all happened for a reason. Lennie and I aren’t meant to be here; we’re not meant to be getting married. It was all just a stupid, impulsive idea. Dreaming that I could be like other people, growing up and having a family life. My mum didn’t manage it. She made mistake after mistake. Looks like the apple – or rather, the lemon – hasn’t fallen far from the tree.
‘Yes, I took the lemons,’ Valerie says, sitting and sniffing into a hanky, and I focus on her rather than Luca. She looks around the group, who have obviously heard the story and are willing her on. I check whether Tabitha is taking notes. Gratefully, I see she isn’t. ‘I took them . . .’ Valerie swallows, ‘because . . . I wanted to go home.’
I stand and look at her, confused.
‘I wanted you and Lennie to come with me, move into my house. It’s far too big for me. I knew this day would come, when he would want to leave. I’m as lonely as anything. At least with Lennie there I had someone to cook and wash for. But I knew you wouldn’t agree if I just asked you.’
I say nothing. I see her eyes flick to Luca and back to me.
‘I didn’t want anything to get in the way of you and Lennie getting married.’
My heart starts galloping. My mouth goes dry. Did she see us? Oh, stupid, stupid me! Why do I always spoil everything good in my life?
‘I thought if the verdello were gone, you’d think it was Il Nonno. That you’d’ve had enough of being here and would come home with me.’
‘But what about Etna? The wedding?’ Sherise asks.
