Page 46 of Forgotten Vows
“What is it?” She raised her brows at me. “I signed the papers for Lev to start that tutoring program, if that’s what you’re asking me about.”
“No. No.” I stuck my hands in my pockets. “I just wanted to ask again if there is anything you can remember about your father. About his death.”If he’s dead or alive.
“No.” She donned an impatient smirk as she looked out the window instead of maintaining eye contact with me. “I have been under the assumption, like others, that he was killed. Word spreads, but I know it can just be rumors, too.”
“You never reached out or anything? You never contacted anyone from your family to know if he was alive?”
She hesitated for just a second. “No, Ivan. For my own safety, for Lev’s safety, I never wanted to initiate a line of contact with anyone from the Petrov outfit. I couldn’t dare to risk being tracked or traced like that. I never wanted to investigate anything of that former life. I left it all behind and only wanted the peace to raise my son the best I could.”
Ourson.
He’s our son, Raisa. Not just yours.
If she was feeling clingy, fine. But she had to remember I was in the picture now. Lev deserved both of his parents, because I wanted to be present as much as she did.
“Why didn’t you ever look for me after the word spread that he was dead?”
I stared at her with that direct question she’d asked of me.
“After rumors spread that he had been killed, why did you still stay away from me?”
She’d hate it if I pointed out how vulnerable she sounded to ask me such a thing. I could only be honest with my reply and hope she didn’t assume I was lying.
“Because I believed it was safest to stay away from you. In case he was still alive. To avoid your being caught in the crossfire of the very family politics that caused us to split in the first place.”
She furrowed her brow, watching me. “Hmm.”
“What?” I asked, intrigued with how long she’d stay this hostile. I knew better than to push things too fast. I’d give her space and time and not make things more complicated with sex. But dammit, she was stubborn.
“How’s it any different now?” she asked. “These family politics are still in the way. Can you look me in the eye right now and tell me that if Luka determined me untrustworthy, you’d insist that I stay?”
Of course. Of course, you would stay with me.Yet, I knew that if I answered her, she’d twist my words somehow.
“I can’t comment on that matter. It’s an ongoing investigation, Raisa. We have many men and spies looking into all that you’ve told me so far. We have men looking for evidence of whether your father is alive or dead, if he’s hiding somewhere and remains a threat, especially with Lev in our lives.”
She rolled her eyes. “Sure, sure. Like always. Family over love. What Luka wants is priority.”
“Hey.” I frowned at her, not liking her tone. “That isn’t true and you know it. You and Levarefamily, whether anyone else wants to admit it or not. I do. I can admit that you are the mother of my son. And the biggest difference right now is that you are with me, here”—I stepped closer and dared her to protest,wishing I could hug her instead of getting stern with her—“and I’m not in any rush to see you or Lev go anywhere far.”
I’d prefer it if they never strayed out of sight. Because in these slow couple of weeks of letting them adjust to being within my orbit while the umbrella of Dubinin security sheltered them, I’d come closer to realizing they were my destiny.
Myfamily.
One I’d fight for no matter who wanted to challenge me from either side of the old rivalry.
20
RAISA
The first day I rode with guards to let Lev go to school was intense. The paranoia of being out in the world was terrifying after how I’d had to kill those Italians the last day Lev and I were “free”.
Yet, having Ivan and Emil in the car on the ride there helped.
It wasn’t like I was new to all of this.
I grew up as a Petrov. My father was extremely old-fashioned and conservative, never daring to let me out of his sight or supervision. He hawked over me, watching my every move in case I acted out of line.
It wasn’t because he cared. He simply saw me as a thing to groom and keep pure. All my life, since my mother died so young, I had my father’s guards around me. Always watching. Never alone. It was a stifling way to grow up, and it was why I was so stubborn to let Lev have a different childhood.
