Page 40 of Forgotten Vows
“Just not as much as Serena, huh?”
He stepped in closer, taking hold of me again. His fingers curled around my upper arm, but with his other hand, he set it on my neck. Canting my head upward with his thumb under my chin, he reminded me of how easily he could reassert his dominance.
“You’ve been here for a week now. Tell me where you’ve seen her.”
I rolled my eyes. It prompted his to turn darker. More serious.
“She’s not in the picture, Raisa.”
For all I knew, she could be at his house, waiting for him to come back.
If not her, then another woman. There wasn’t a chance that he had been celibate all this time.
“She will never be in the picture.” Smoothing his thumb over the line of my jaw, he stared at my lips with hunger. With lust. “No one will ever matter to me like you do.”
I swallowed hard, trying to force it past the emotion clogging in my throat. He was being too kind. Seductive, yet honest.
“I’ve missed you so much,” he confessed in a raspy whisper. “And it kills me that you could ever think that you don’t matter to me.”
I closed my eyes as he lowered his head. Resting his brow against mine, he wrapped his free arm around me. Being held close like this felt like a step in the right direction. This snug up against him was a test, a strained pressure to deny myself the opportunity to lean against him and let him shoulder the burdens of stress weighing me down.
“Because you do.” He rubbed his thumb over my jawline again. His breath wisped against my skin, warming it and teasing me to seek out all the heat he could provide me.
As I licked my lips and tried not to cave under the need for him, suspended in this tense wait to give up and show him how badly I’d missed him too, I hesitated.
You matter, too.
Not just as the source of protection I needed for our son, but as the one man who would always hold my heart. The one I wanted to hate even though he tempted me to lose control and race for that bliss we could find together, no matter the circumstances standing in the way of true happiness and peace.
17
IVAN
Dark, sinister thoughts raced through my mind. The mere possibility of this woman thinking that she didn’t matter was enough to destroy what remained of my sanity.
Seeing her again had thrown me off balance. But to hear her declare that she was nothing to me? That she wasn’t important to me despite the distance we’d had to suffer through for years?
“I have missed you every single second you were gone,” I confessed in a ragged whisper. Pressing my face lower, to urge her to tip her lips up to mine, I frowned when she turned away.
“That can’t be true,” she argued, furrowing her brow as she peered up at me. That hostility lurked in her gaze, but it wasn’t directed at me as a strike. She was simply that defensive, and truly, I couldn’t blame her.
“That can’t be true,” she repeated as I began to guide her to backtrack toward my bed. “If it was, then you would’ve looked for me. You would’ve come for me and kept me close and?—”
“Itistrue, Raisa.” I clutched her close and kissed her deeply. Holding back was impossible when she’d look at me with equal parts yearning and loathing. I had to taste her. Kiss her. Swallow her sighs and encourage her to whimper with need.
I had to have her—all of her. We still had so much more to talk about, but I needed her.
“I’ve missed you since the moment I had to leave.” Breathing raggedly, I stared down at her as her eyes warmed with lust. As if these were the magic words to make her understand. “And now that you’ve foundme, now that you’ve come forme…”
“No.” She shook her head. “I didn’t come to get you back, Ivan. I came to keep Lev safe.”
I gripped her chin as I loosened my tie. “I’m calling your bluff.”
“Bluff?” She smirked. “I’m not bluffing. This isn’t some fantasy of a reunion or anything other than me needing help to keep him safe from the Riveras or anyone else, any other of your enemies.”
With my tie in my hand, I took hold of both of hers and began tying them, preferring to lazily and hungrily sample her lips. Kissing her quiet was a cop-out, but she wasn’t protesting.
“I’m calling your bluff,” I repeated as I finished securing the bond on her hands. “You came to me.”
