Page 139 of Power Move
“I didn’t do it on purpose. You’ve been so happy about the babies that I didn’t want to bring the mood down. Emotionally, I’m so worn down and panicked about being on leave. We’re at a cafe. Nothing is happening.”
Mona’s mouth dropped, as if she knew what this argument was about.
“Your lying makes me think otherwise.”
“Davey, I am allowed to?—”
“We talk about things like this. When you hide things, I don’t trust you. I don’t care about you talking to Mona. Idocare about you lying.”
“I’m not up to anything.”
“Eva, when you lie about one thing, I assume you’re lying about much more! Prove me wrong!”
I fought tears as his voice rattled in anger. He thought I wascheating? Why would I do that? I’d confessed my love for him and fought for us. I’d chosen to stay even when shit got hard. I’d given so much of myself—including my body.
“What more could I leave out? It was a white lie?—”
“It wasstilla lie. And that coupled with all this discussion of running off to London understandably concerns me.”
“I want to go to fix the business shit. I want to go because it feels like home. I want to get far away from my own fears about all of this.”
“Us? You are suddenly worried about us?”
“David, don’t do this! Don’t speak for me. Motherhood scares me. And you? You don’t get like this. Why are we here? Why are you putting all this doubt on me? It’s scaring me!”
“You don’t lie. Because this is so out of character for you, I have a reason to give into this idiotic fear that you’re going to run off to London?—”
I laughed nervously. “Oh my God, I would never?—”
“Don’t act like I’m being ridiculous! We aren’t married. You could run off with the boys wherever! What is to keep you from running off with my babies to anywhere?”
I debated just telling him this was the only little white lie. I was sorry he was just in a pre-baby tailspin over this. It wasn’t my intent. I wanted to apologize, but when he said that they werehisbabies, I lost it.
“Yourbabies?” I gasped. “Davey, last I checked, they wereours. And you don’t get to accuse me of that!”
“Why not? If you are going to lie about one thing, why not just lie about everything?”
A pain hit deep in my stomach—one felt a couple of times in my office. I knew it was a contraction, but I ignored it. They were mostly silly, and I could work through them. This time, Igripped the table with my spare hand, barely breathing as it rolled through me.
I sobbed, “You don’t get to make assumptions. I’ve given you no indication I would ever do that. I’ve been loyal. I’ve put up with a lot?—”
“So have I! Being happy is just impossible for you! I cannot do this anymore!”
He hung up as I fell apart.
“What is happening? Is he cross with me?” Mona asked. “Eva, didn’t youtellhim? You’ve walked into a straight man minefield?—”
“I didn’t think he would care,” I gasped. “I’m… I’m sorry, but… I didn’t tell him. I thought I’d just drop in, get this done, and not bother him.”
“What is going on? How can I help? I feel awful, Eva.”
“I’m… he just broke up with me. I have absolutely no idea?—”
“Why would he do that? I doubt that is true.”
“No, I am pretty sure that was the implication.”
“You should go right home and talk to him. He seems to love you. The stakes are high and… well, I loved many parts of you, Eva, but you are not easy to decipher. You hold it all in. You cannot do that with him.”
