Page 52 of Hunted By Wolves and Shadow
“You do. You’ve stuck yourself into a lonely caretaker role here. Most of us have found comfort in each other over the annums, casually or more intimately, but you stick to friendship and to yourself. Like you think a leader needs to stand apart and spend equal time with everyone. I’m saying, if you love her, let her in.”
“It’s not that serious, Robin. Don’t worry.”
She abandoned the topic and nodded over my shoulder, where Emi was approaching. “Be safe out there,” Robin told us both,then she turned back to me, “and we love you no matter what happens, Wolf.”
I hadn’t known I needed to hear that until it felt like a weight fell from my shoulders.
At the magic barrier entrance to the enclave, Emi turned around for a last thoughtful look at all the people gathered to watch us go, and the others going about their mornings. She was quiet as we prepared to step through, but I saw her slip her dagger from its sheath to hold it at her side.
I nodded my readiness and let her follow me through the gap. After everything—after finding her cuddled to my side this morning and getting to hold her, and after seeing the way she ingratiated herself with my family—I knew I wouldn’t hurt her. Not ever. I could walk by her side as a wolf, and she’d be perfectly safe and protected.
And if I had to drop my clothes before shifting, well…that was just a necessity of this life. A bonus. Not my fault.
Who could blame me for using what I had when it garnered that pretty blush? I'd take what scraps I could get, and the memories would have to keep me warm at night once this was over.
I let the summoning fire guide me into the Mist. Pain shattered through me as I shifted, sweet and sharp as muscle and bone melted and solidified into my cursed form. My paws hit the leaves coating the forest floor. Scents and sounds intensified, and my vision sharpened with edges of silver.
While Emi walked beside me, I found it easier than ever to keep my own mind. None of the wolf's instincts to hunt or protect my pack from her rose to the front this time. She held her dagger at her side, ready in case I lost control, but I wanted to tell her she didn't need it.
I was at peace.
Something had shifted inside me. She was as much a part of my pack and my heart as any of the enclave, even though I couldn't have imagined this mere days ago. Robin called it love, but all I knew was Emi had healed me, and that had bonded something between us. At least, it had for me.
Chapter 24
Wolf
When we reached the cottage’s clearing, Emi strode straight to the pile of clothes I’d left when we departed. The first thing I felt as my body shifted was the amused grin on my face. She was holding out my trousers with an adorable tight line to her lips, silently scolding me for the ways this had happened before.
“Don't pretend you didn't like it,” I teased, laughing when she huffed and handed me my tunic and vest.
No sooner had I tucked in the former and buttoned the latter, Emi had her eyes on me, waiting.
“Something wrong?” I asked, dropping the teasing at the intense look on her face. My eyes took in her tight posture and the empty scabbard at her hip.
“You're not what I thought.” She scrutinized me.
I wished I could take back a lot of what had happened, mostly things I’d said to her and the ways I’d pushed her in those early days. But I couldn't take back the one thing that had hurt her the most. “I am exactly what you thought, Emi. I'm both a murderer and a monster, nothing can change that.”
Conflict raged in her beautiful eyes. From denial to anger to confusion to pity, emotions flashed, one after the other.
I wouldn't have it. I hated seeing her so conflicted and I didn’t deserve her pity. I certainly didn’t deserve her forgiveness.
“I killed your grandmother for a chance to spare my own family, and I wouldn’t change it even if I could. Doesn't that make me a monster?” I stepped closer, drawn in like a moth to a flame. “Those people, they're everything to me. Now you know why I had to act on the prophecy, but that doesn’t make it right.
“I know there’s no forgiveness for what I did. I knew it when I stalked her and when her cold eyes locked on me as I attacked. I knew there was no going back while she tried to spit out one last curse before my teeth tore out her voice, and I knew I’d live with her blood on me for the rest of my life while I finished the job.” My words were harsh and blunt, aimed to shock the sympathy from her face, but Emi didn’t back down from me. “I would do it all again, even knowing it would make you hate me, even knowing I failed and let them down in the end, because I had to try. If there was anything I could do to fix this,”—I glanced around the misty forest—“I had to do everything in my power to break the curse. But I am sorry for what it took from you. For that, there is no forgiveness.“
My eyes found hers again, and I was done.
I couldn't tell her that I worried she was the anchor to the curse. If I were really willing to do anything at all to end this, then I should wrest that blade from her and plunge it into her heart. But I knew I couldn't. This world wouldn't be right without Emerald Brightbane in it.
Emi shook her head slowly. “You didn't let them down.”
“What?”
“The enclave. You didn't let them down. Did any of them seem disappointed in you? Because all I saw was trust and devotion and...and, love. They all love you, Wolf. You're a family.Youbuilt that for them.Youbrought them all together, and you keep as many as you can safe from the worst of the curse. Robin told me you tend to do this.”
Emi was closer now, her face tilted to meet my questioning gaze. We shared the same air as I lifted a brow.
