Page 128 of Drive
“Damn you and your memory. Do you listen to everything I say?”
“Yes,” I reported proudly.
“Fine—” he sighed “—but only after I dance with my boo bear.” I gave him a kiss on the cheek. Seeking different eyes, I noticed Reid was no longer in his chair. Desperately searching for him, I spotted him at the side entrance, his tentative stare on me dancing with my father, his hands on the metal bar at the door. I could see it all there: the regret, the apology, the decision, and the resignation.
Brad sang about laying down his life for the woman he loved as Reid dropped his gaze and pressed through the door.
I clung to my dad’s shoulders as he walked out on me for the second time.
Heart seizing, I slumped in my father’s arms my head on his shoulder.
“Boo?”
“Dance, Daddy, just dance,” I said as I cried softly into his jacket.
At our condo hours later, I watched Nate from the rocking chair we picked out together as he slept on the couch. His dark, strawberry blond hair was an utter mess from a day of running his hands through it. He was still in his work slacks and undershirt. The incredible man I loved slept soundly, his breathing even. Behind him sat three pictures of us. The first was at aUTgame. I was sitting in his lap with my hands clasped around his neck. We were smiling like lunatics. The second was on Gabe’s boat. I’d just caught a huge large-mouthed bass and was holding it up proudly to the camera. Nate was behind me with his arms wrapped securely around me. The last was on New Year’s Eve just weeks ago. Nate was kissing me in a room full of people. It was a candid and it was my favorite. I sniffed as I pushed away the budding tears and felt the guilt start to gnaw at me. I knew without a doubt I’d cheated on him. The kiss on New Year’s that Reid left me with was nothing compared to the deceit in my heart. I loved Nate Butler. Enough to marry him and keep the life we’d built, the story we started.
And I loved Reid Crowne with a passion very few people experience in their lifetime.
There was zero contest in my heart. I’d lived without one for so long, I’d forsaken him for the other. I never felt cheated, or like I was missing anything because the choice was never mine.
Until that night.
And Reid had just flipped it upside down.
I’m right here, Stella.
I clamped my hands over my mouth as I fought the sobs. It was all wrong, so wrong. I’d kept them separate for so long, I didn’t know how to face the fact that the woman on the dance floor, ready to flee with Reid, was the same woman sitting in the chair staring at Nate.
I had sat in mySUVfor a solid hour trying to muster up the courage to drive, because I wasn’t sure where I would end up.
Torn.
In love with two worthy kings, and I was queen of the damned.
“Hey,” Nate said, a lazy, sexy smile covering his face. “Baby, what you doing in that chair so far away?”
I knew if I spoke, he would hear it in my voice. I gave myself a second to breathe.
“Stella?”
“Hi,” I said through a throat full of emotion. I was so fucked.
“Hey, what’s wrong?”
“I wanted to write for the big rags, Nate.”
He sat up and looked down at the floor between us. “I know.”
“I wanted to travel when I graduated.”
“We will.”
“When?” I hated myself in that moment for thinking that I wasn’t the least bit satisfied with our life, because I was. But I could not ignore Reid’s accusations. “The paper is only going to get bigger.”
“Come here.”
I shook my head. “Am I being put on hold?”
