Page 138 of Severed Heart
“Is that so?” I shove my fists into my jeans. “Well, by all means, clue me in, General,” I bite out, cutting all bullshit, not missing the slight but visceral reaction to her spoken nickname—one which still glides easily off my tongue.
“Youknowvery well what I’m speaking,” she states. “Why are you here, Tyler?”
“I’m afraid not only do Inot know, Delphine, I have no fucking idea. So, I’m afraid cryptic replies won’t do. What do you mean we have a different opinion on the nature of my promise? And you might need to refresh my memory,” I lie, “because I’ve done a lot of living since that day ... seems like I’m theonly one.”
“So many words coming from you, but you haven’t answered my question,” she says above a whisper, knowing I can hear it.
“I’m here forher,” I state, cutting through the bullshit pretense we used for almost the entirety of the time Cecelia and I were here.
“For the woman I first laid true eyes on when I was sixteenaftershe helped me breathe through taking one of the hardest hits of my life. The woman I befriended when I was seventeen who challenged me, taught me about necessary evils, and how to soldier. The woman who, despite our age difference, somehow became my best friend at eighteen. Who I trusted with my darkest secrets. The woman who broke my fucking heart when I was a blink away from nineteen because she thought it was the right thing to do. I’m here for her, and I want to spend time with her before she dies—ifshe dies—and that’s still avery big if, according to your oncologist.”
“That woman ... is no longer here,” Delphine delivers on exhale, lifting more poison to her lips. “And by the way you refuse to spare me from your disappointment and continue to condemn me with your eyes and tongue—you are very aware that’s the truth of it.”
“How would you know? You haven’t looked at me once since I walked through the fucking door,” I snap, taking a step in to engage the long-awaited battle awakening inside me. “And she’s fucking here,” I declare, taking another menacing step toward her chair, “and I want her back.”
“Hmm.” She makes a mockery out of my words with that trite jab, and it’s all I can do to keep from smashing the bottle she’s continually draining with my fist.
“You better enjoy that bottle,” I snap, “because it’s your fucking last.”
She takes a long sip, hesitating briefly before putting the glass down.
“This seems familiar, Soldier,” she relays cooly, “an appearance and another demand.”
“I know what I did. I did exactly what you expected me to do. What they’ve all done to you, but you knew just what to say and how to get me to leave you, though I realized that not long after I left.”
“But you didn’t return,” she states, her purposeful lack of eye contact infuriating.
“I’ve since made it a healthy habit of taking people for their word when I’m not wanted, preferring to be in the company of those who do.”
“I see ... well, that was long ago, Tyler, so there is no point in arguing or bringing up the past,” she counters.
“That’s rich,” I snark, “since you live in a fucking shrine to your own past. From the looks of it, you haven’t bothered to—”
“Let’s not fight. Come. Sit, tell me how you are,” she prompts.
“I’m quite comfortable staring down at you, making youuncomfortable. Seems like no one has managed to successfully do that in years. But what I do know, Delphine, is that as of right now—and because of what you’ve fucking done toher,to the woman I came for—my tap shoes have fucking ceased to exist. So, I’m afraid I’m not up for tap dancing around the truth today.”
It’s then she finally lifts her gorgeous gray eyes to me to reveal why she’s been avoiding contact. Because they’re not only fully bloodshot but severely swollen. I take a few more steps closer to see her face is heavily splotched, indicating she hasn’t just been crying since we left—she’s beensobbing. My heart cracks instantly at the sight, and that I was dead on in interpreting what that hug meant. She has no plans of surviving or trying to. None. That hug was goodbye.
Hold steady, Jennings.
“Why did you come back?” she asks, her voice shaking, even as her eyes ice over in preparation. “To further humiliate me? To gloat? You have no audience this time.”
“You’ve made that all too easy, whether intentional or not. And I just fucking told you why.” I stand my ground unapologetically.
“Because you still care for me?” she scoffs. “Stillloveme?”
“Yes,” I reply simply as her lips part slightly in surprise as I take another step toward her chair. “I’ve just been doing it from a distance asordered.”
“My order remains the same,” she states, turning her head away from me. “Leave me, Tyler. You are obviouslythrivingand ... very happy. You only came here because you were forced. That girl,” Delphine sighs, “has a naïve heart, and as much as it annoyed me today, it’sher heartthat brought you here, my lost soldier,not yours,” she condemns.
“Oh, is that the truth of it?” I shake my head in annoyance.
“You’ll be a fool to try and convince me otherwise. So”—she waves me away—“take your fucking pity and condemnation with you when you go. And whatever obligation you might feel you have”—she turns her head and pins me with her glare—“allow me to relieve you of it.”
“Love might be the only thing I have left for you, and it’s not romantic in nature.” Her eyes dull as if that’s not news as I continue to lie through my fucking teeth while blurting the rest of the truth. “Respect,gone. Admiration,gone. Everything that once attracted me to you,gone,and it has little to nothing to do with the way you fucking look but what you’ve done to the woman I knew. For that,you willfucking answer to me.”
“You have no right to me,” she utters in lifeless defense, “or to speak to me this way.”
