Page 101 of Severed Heart
“Has no idea what he is asking his biggest asset!” I screech. “I work with you for your future with Ezekiel and Jean Dominic, not the fucking US military.”
“Look, I agree it’s flawed, but that’s why I’m—”
“Flawed?!” I gawk as my hands begin to tremble. I haven’t raised my voicelike thisto a man in years with such concern. I steady myself on the counter as that truth sinks in. Seeing my sudden shift, Tyler covers my shaking hands with his own. I bite my lip as I stare down at them.
Who will steady my hands when he leaves?
Selfish. I’m being selfish, and my selfish mouth speaks again. “What areyou thinking, Soldier?”
“I’m thinking you can’t write the whole bushel off for a few bad apples. There are thousands and thousands of good men and women who sign up with the best of intentions. So, what I’m thinking is that I’m doing this for them, for the dad I had, and for my Uncle Gray, whose hands sometimes shake like yours. What I’m also thinking is that I have to have the fucking resume to protect any higher-up in government. If we get Preston into office, think of what we can do and the changes we can make.”
“If, Tyler,if,” I say, as my entire upper body begins to tremble.
“Don’t be afraid,” he utters softly. So close, he’s so close. His smell surrounds me, bringing me comfort in one heartbeat while searing me the next. “Speak your mind, yell at me. I can take anything but you being afraid of me.”
“I’m not afraid of you, Tyler,” I exhale, “I’m afraidforyou.”
“Do you honestly have so little faith in me?”
“All the faith in the world!” I admonish, chest heaving as the anxiety builds and builds, and my eyes start to water. “All of the faith I am capable of resides insideyou, Tyler, and my nephews. You have all my respect, you have my hopes, and you have my—” I stop myself as realization sets in that I’m squaring off with not any man but this man, and it’s becoming more and more clear why.
He runs his thumbs soothingly over the back of my hands, his eyes dipping to the movement as I study him up close. So beautiful, my best friend, and he’s leaving. He’s leaving.
“Glad you think so,” he whispers, bringing his pleading, rich brown eyes to mine, “but this is my fight. This is my stake in this club. This is my chance to try to make a difference.”
“Tyler.” I take a deep inhale. “You are needed here.Here, in Triple Falls, I did not spend all this time...” I bite my lip, disbelieving of my selfishness. “All this time.”
I pull my hands away before stalking over to the freezer for my pint. He’s at my back in an instant, crowding me against it. He cradles me with his body as my selfish tears start to fall.
“Whoneeds me here, Delphine?” he asks, his voice telling in that he’s aware of his answer as his warm breath tickles my ear. “I’ll come back. You know I will. I can’t go a single day now without talking to or seeing my best friend.”
The feel of him has me opening my freezer door, and he slaps it shut just as quickly, inching in and cradling me with his body, his warmth enveloping me. “Please don’t. Please talk to me.”
“No point,” I croak weakly. “I know you well enough to know you have made up your imbecilic mind.”
“Whoneeds me here, Delphine?” he repeats, as he grips my hip with a warm, calloused palm while burying his nose in my hair. He’s steel behind me, solid man, and briefly, I get lost in the feel of him, sinking into his hold and comfort. “God dammit ...now?” he whispers, running his forehead back and forth along my shoulder.
I stiffen in understanding of his meaning as he slowly turns me to face him, caging me in his arms against my refrigerator. Edging in, his eyes implore mine, the tension in the air thickening, his perfect, full lips so close.
“You are too valuable to be someone else’s soldier,” I utter hoarsely.
Grabbing my hand, he presses my palm to his chest. “I’ll never be anyone else’s soldier, and I think you just realized that.”
“My soldier would stay,” I whisper as he lifts his hand to stroke my cheek with gentle fingers. He’s so close now that we’re sharing breath, our foreheads touching.
“Soldiers don’t stay, General,” he whispers, “but your soldier will come back to you. Every fucking time you order him to.”
“Then I order you not to go.” I lick at a tear as it reaches my lip, and he follows the movement.
Licking his own lips, he slowly lifts my bleeding thumb to his mouth before wrapping his lips around it and gently sucking. The added feel of his tongue tracing the tiny cut has my eyes fluttering.
Entranced, I watch as he continues to suck my thumb, and a soft whimper I can’t hold escapes me. His eyes fire as it leaves my parted lips. The need to flee fills me, the desire running rampant between us with no way to contain it. It’s too prominent now, too present and threatening. As my breaths increase, I realize this attraction has gone on longer than I’ve allowed myself to acknowledge. The look in his eyes confirming as much, as well as my response to him. When did I let this happen?
“I’m here now,” he whispers in a way that heats every inch of me.
I drop my eyes. “Tyler, we—”
“Look at me, Delphine.”
