Page 14 of Colin Gets Promoted and Dooms the World
They all laughed and nodded in commiseration as I exited the elevator, then crowded on, doing their best to avoid the worst of the blood. As messes went at Dark Enterprises, it wasn’t bad. Last month an intern had exploded all over the lobby, forcing us to slip and slideour way to the revolving doors at the end of the day. The five people chattered to one another as the doors rolled closed, and I went looking for a bathroom where I could wash my face and wipe down my shoes.
Once I was presentable again, I delivered the crumpled envelope to the cheerful young woman in charge of disappearing unwanted employees before backtracking to the elevators. I was absurdly relieved when the other, non-blood-spattered elevator arrived, and as I rode it back up to thirteen, I gave myself a little pep talk.Everything is fine, I thought firmly.That Thing is gone, and it left your internal organs where they’re supposed to be. That’s a big win. Sure, yes, it said it was going to devour the world, but that’s probably just a figure of speech. There’s nothing to worry about and certainly no reason to panic.
Back at my desk outside Ms.Crenshaw’s office, I started sorting through her emails, marking as urgent those that required her immediate attention. It wasn’t even noon yet, but it felt like my first day as an executive assistant had been roughly twenty-eight hours long at this point.
Some indeterminate time later, animposing white woman built like a pro athlete stalked into the waiting room. She wore the all-black suit and radio earpiece of our Security teams, and as she made a determined beeline for the open door to Ms.Crenshaw’s office, I smiled and asked, “Can I help you?”
She didn’t so much as glance at me as she strode past my desk. Thinking that I should at least make a nominal attempt to stop her from walking in on my boss, I rose to my feet and hastened after her. “Excuse me!” I called.
Paying me no mind whatsoever, the woman came to a halt in front of Ms.Crenshaw’s desk and announced, “We have a situation, ma’am.”
“I’m sorry, Ms.Crenshaw,” I added as I hovered helplessly in the doorway.
Seated behind her desk, Ms.Crenshaw looked first at me and then lifted an inquiring eyebrow at the other woman. “A situation, Chief?”
“Five employees have gone missing from the building, ma’am.” The security chief’s voice was raspy, as if she smoked three packs a day. “More specifically, they entered an elevator on the fourth floor and disappeared before they reached the cafeteria.”
A chill swept over me as I listened.
“I see.” Ms.Crenshaw folded her hands together on her desk. “Do we know what happened to them?”
“Not yet, ma’am, no. The elevator was covered in blood, but far less than we’d expect to see if they’d been attacked. There’s no trace of them at all. They’re simply gone.”
“Haunts?” my boss suggested. “Or perhaps something happened while they were passing the eighth floor.” Home to Research and Development, the eighth floor routinely experienced dimensional implosions, catastrophic disintegrations, and widespread loss of life. The only people who felt comfortable going anywhere near it were the weirdos who worked there.
The chief nodded curtly. “We’re investigating every possibility, but so far, we’ve drawn a blank. I wanted to inform you personally, though, in case you decide to institute specific security measures.”
Ms.Crenshaw considered this before saying, “Until we know more, I don’t see a need for a stringent response. Let’s monitor that particular elevator, however, in case it happens again.”
“Very well, ma’am.” The chief paused. “Oh, one more thing. Analysis and Logistics has detected traces of the Seraphic Conclave here in Manhattan.”
Ms.Crenshaw’s lip curled. “I’m not surprised. There are rats everywhere in this city.”
“One of their agents has been traced to Midtown, ma’am.”
A long, chilly silence descended. “That is more concerning,” my boss said at last. “And should not have been allowed to happen.”
The other woman shifted her feet on the pale carpet. “I’ll make sure this agent of the Conclave keeps their distance. Unless you want me to take more aggressive steps?”
“No. If we kill one of them, a dozen more will appear. Just make sure they leave our people alone.”
Giving Ms.Crenshaw a nod, the chief turned on her heel and paused when she found me standing between her and the door. Hastily stepping aside, I continued to hover ineffectually as she left the room.
“In the future, Colin, try not to let people barge in here.” Ms.Crenshaw’s voice was cool as she turned her dark eyes on me.
“Of course,” I said quickly, though I had no idea how I could have stopped that woman. She probably would have broken me in half if I’d tried. “Sorry.” Pausing for a moment, I added casually, “So, uh, these missing employees…”
“You know as well as I do that we lose people all the time.”
Swallowing, I nodded. It was certainly true that we experienced more turnover than your average company, what with all the destructive magicks and sadistic entities we dealt with on a daily basis. Maybe those five people had disappeared for a reason that had nothing to do with the Thing I’d freed. Yeah, that was it. “And the Seraphic Conclave?”
“An archaic collection of sanctimonious busybodies,” she said with a dismissive wave of her hand. “Their history stretches back a very long way. They see it as their sacred obligation to oppose the work we do, though they’re little more than hypocritical thugs.”
I pondered this in silence before asking, “Why are they hypocritical?”
Ms.Crenshaw leaned forward and picked up her phone from the desk. “Because they wield the same magicks we do. They are descended from traitors and fools who forgot their obligations and decided instead to use stolen secrets for their own self-righteous ends.” She unlocked her phone and tapped rapidly on its screen. “Examine every purge and witch hunt closely enough, and you will find the Conclave at the root of it.”
“And it’s bad that they’re hanging around Midtown?”
