Page 46 of Through the Snow Globe
Diana narrowed her eyes. “Says me.”
Rochelle leaned back in her chair. Diana could practically see the wheels spinning in her head. “Sometimes when people are afraid, they hyper focus on something to channel all of their energy and attention toward. To avoid the things they’re most afraid of.”
Diana couldn’t resist. If she was going to be subjected to therapy, she was going to take another sip of her drink. “I’m not afraid.”
“Linus proposed this summer. Setting a date by now isn’t an unreasonable expectation. Your parents divorced. Your grandmother was a single mom. It would make sense that commitment might be a scary thing for you.”
Diana shifted restlessly. “No more counseling. I want my best friend back.”
Rochelle leaned forward as she narrowed her gaze. “Iambeing your best friend, and I’m telling things the way I see them. Also . . .” She nibbled at her lower lip.
“What?” Diana asked, a pinch of worry in her chest.
“Maybe you don’t truly want this promotion.”
“Of course I want it!” Diana nearly shouted. “Why wouldn’t I want it?”
Rochelle shrugged. “You’re a caregiver. You love working with your patients. I’m not sure I can see you stuck in some office telling others what to do. It’s not your style.”
“I would make a great manager,” Diana objected.
“I’m not saying you wouldn’t. But would it make you happy? That’s all I’m asking. I wonder . . .” Rochelle seemed to hesitate.
“Go ahead.”
“I just wonder if you’re investing so much energy into your work suddenly because you’re avoiding taking the next step with Linus. He wants to build something with you, and, well, I wonder if that scares the ever-loving crap out of you.”
“I’m not scared. And I’m not pushing Linus away.”
“I just want you to be happy, Diana. But you can’t be if you shut everyone out. That promotion to management won’t fill the void.”
Diana pushed back from the table and stood. “Thanks for whatever this was. Send me a bill.”
“Diana?” Rochelle called after her.
Diana looked back at her friend before walking out. She couldn’t sit and listen to any more of this. Were Rochelle’s insights about her true? If so, it meant she’d wasted so much time this year when she could have been spending it with Linus. “What?”
“What would happen if you stopped pretending everything was fine? If you told Linus exactly how you felt? Me? Yourself?”
Diana shook her head. “You want to know how I feel? I feel ganged up on right now.”
Diana turned and continued walking. She was shaking as she exited the bar and stood in the cold afternoon. It wasn’t sleeting today, but the air was thick with moisture. Diana hurried to her car and got inside, taking deep breaths.What was that?Diana wasn’t running scared from her life. She was living her life, trying to achieve success by going for a management position. Why couldn’t everyone see that?
Diana checked the time on her cell phone. It was already late afternoon. Linus would be closing the store in an hour and a half. The rest of her schedule was clear. There was nothing stopping her from going to the Toy Peddler and spending as much time with Linus as she could before driving him home safe and sound.
Diana drove in that direction. Christmas was in full effect in Snow Haven. There were little wreaths on all the light posts. She drove past the huge Christmas tree in the town square. Then she arrived at Linus’s store. As she got out, the air felt even colder than before. The sun wasn’t even visible through the thick clouds that were hanging low and promising a blanket of the white stuff sometime soon. Diana had already lived through most of this month, though. There wouldn’t be any snow falling. No chance of a white Christmas here.
She locked up her car and headed inside. The tiny bell jingled overhead and Linus looked up from his register where he was helping a man with his purchases.
Linus’s brows hung heavily as he looked at her. No doubt he wondered what Diana was doing here. Linus had a passion for kids and toys but, with the exception of the time she’d come here looking for a toy for her coworker, she had tried to avoid places like this. When she was young, she’d always wanted to go into the toy stores, but Grandma Denny had told her toys from such places were too expensive. Diana’s toys were mostly hand-me-downs or they’d been purchased from yard sales. That was one reason Diana always gave to the sidewalk Santa. Every kid deserved a new toy at Christmas. Every child should also have a loving home.
Diana headed down one of the aisles, knowing Linus would find her once he was done handling his customers. Baby dolls lined the shelves that she passed. There were all sorts of dolls that cried, peed, ate, and burped. Several of the ones with less savory traits were what Linus had suggested to her the first time she’d come in.
She smiled as she continued to peruse. There was doll clothing and shoes, strollers and diapers. Diana looked at them all, fascinated by the options. Then she overheard a woman and a small boy a little ways down the aisle.
“You’ll have to wait until Christmas,” the woman told the boy.
“What if Santa doesn’t bring me anything? What if I’ve been too bad?” he asked.
