Page 63 of Welcome Home, Cowboy
She traced a finger over his arm. “Do you want to talk about what you were dreaming about on Thursday morning? What your nightmares are about?”
He took a long, deep breath. “I dream about the crash. The Marine that died. The ones that lived. That’s all.” This was the most he’d talked to anyone about what was going on in his head. He stared up into the starry night, waiting for a helicopter to fly across. It’d become like a personal challenge for him to see how many helos he could watch fly over without breaking into a cold sweat. He liked to control all of his responses: his heart rate, what he thought about when the aircraft flew over, the amount of sweat lining his skin.
“I read that you saved several lives,” Julie said quietly.
Lawson met her gaze. “You read about my accident?”
“Well, it was in theSeaside Daily News.”
He knew that. Everyone knew what had happened to him. They all thought he was a hero. That’s the way the article had portrayed him. He’d even been given a medal. The whole country had admired him.
“I don’t think of myself as a hero,” he said, his voice suddenly tight.
“Because you didn’t save everyone?”
He stared into her eyes, debating if he was going to tell the truth. This was his burden to bear, no one else’s. He nodded. “Yeah. A hero would’ve saved them all.”
Julie reached up slowly, moving her hand over his hair. Then she kissed his cheek softly, his lips. “You know that’s not true.”
Deep down he did. He knew it, but that didn’t keep the fact that Jenkins had lost his life from haunting him.
He reached a hand up to grab ahold of the one she had moving over his forehead. Then he pulled her toward him, suddenly needing to feel her against him. He kissed her, running his hand along her side, down her leg.
“We can’t do this here. This is Camp Leon. What if someone sees us?”
Lawson smiled against her cheek. “I’ve always been a rule breaker. And this is good for my stress.You’regood for my stress.”
Julie laughed, then gasped as he laid her on her back and crawled over her. “You’re serious?” she breathed.
“As a heart attack. We won’t get caught,” he promised. Most of the higher-ranking officers were home at this hour. And whoever was working had better things to do than survey the outer perimeter of the parking area.
She stopped protesting as he slid a hand under her dress. He couldn’t think of anything he wanted more right now than Julie. And that was a thought that scared him as much, if not more, than being at the airfield.
—
Julie moaned as Lawson tugged on her underwear. She’d always fantasized about having sex in the open, where anyone could see. But in the open on a military base? That seemed risky, which made what Lawson was doing to her body all the more intoxicating. He moved from her lips and began kissing his way down her body as she lay on the tailgate. She writhed, anticipating where he was going and what he was going to do.
Then he stopped. She opened her eyes and lifted her head to look at him.
Grinning devilishly, he shook his head. “No closing your eyes. Watching is half the turn-on.”
“Watching?” She swallowed thickly.
“You’ve never watched someone make love to you before?” he asked.
“No. Never.”
“Keep your eyes open this time,” he dared.
She did as he asked, watching as he caressed her inner thigh slowly, running his hand up between her legs. She gasped, working hard not to fling her head back and shut the world out. But he was right: watching him move as he made love to her was intoxicating. Arousing. He planted slow, gentle kisses over her most sensitive places, all the while keeping his gaze lifted, holding hers.
“Lawson,” she moaned, as his tongue caressed her, too. “Lawson.” She couldn’t help herself. She closed her eyes as he did magical things down under, saying his name again and again. “Lawson.”
“I thought you were going to watch,” he said, smiling at her as he crawled back up her body. Hovering over her now, he planted a soft kiss on her forehead as he pressed his groin against her so that she could feel him.
“I tried,” she said breathlessly.
“It’s okay. You can try again next time.”
