Page 67 of The Long Game
Ilya’s expression shuttered, then he began to aggressively adjust his ice pack. Shane felt like he’d said something wrong, but what else could he have said? He didn’t honestly believe that many people would accept them as a couple. They could only stick to the plan, which was continuing on in secret until they were both retired. Or at least until one of them was, but Shane hoped they would retire together. The idea of playing in a league without Ilya seemed strange and hollow.
Shane put a tentative hand on Ilya’s shoulder. “What’s wrong?”
Ilya crossed his arms over his chest and mumbled something in Russian.
“Huh?”
“I thinkyoucare too fucking much.”
“About what? Us?”
“No. About everyone else. Opinions.”
“Aren’t we both concerned about that?”
Ilya didn’t answer, and Shane felt like he was missing something important. “We can talk about it if you—”
“No,” Ilya grumbled. “Is nothing.”
“Okay.” It wasn’t the first time Ilya had seemed randomly upset about something he refused to talk about. Shane worried, sometimes, that there were a lot of things Ilya wasn’t telling him.
Ilya sighed. “Sorry. I am tired. Forget what I am saying.”
Shane brushed a thumb across Ilya’s cheek. “I love you.”
Ilya’s lips quirked up. “Good. Because we are married now.”
Still not sure what any of this was about, Shane picked up the remote from the coffee table and handed it to Ilya. “We can eat on the sofa. Find a movie or something.”
He got to work making a salad to a soundtrack of heroic music and loud explosions coming from the living room. Ilya loved action movies. The lasagna still needed to bake for a while after Shane finished the salad, so he joined his boyfriend on the couch, letting Ilya rest his feet in his lap.
“What movie is it?”
“I don’t know. But Rose is in it.”
Shane squinted at the TV and wished he had his glasses. “Oh yeah. I’ve seen this one. It’s kind of bad.”
“Rose looks beautiful, though.”
“She always does.” They watched in silence while Shane absently rubbed Ilya’s feet.
“You could have had it all,” Ilya teased when Rose was on the screen in a particularly sexy evening gown.
Shane snuggled closer against him. He’d had a question on his mind for weeks. He didn’t want to ruin this cozy moment, but he couldn’t hold it in anymore.
“Ilya?”
Ilya must have heard the caution in Shane’s voice, because his body tensed. “Yes?”
“Are you...okay?”
“Fine. Is just a bruise.”
“No, I mean...” Shane gnawed on his bottom lip, unsure of how to proceed.
“Shane?”
He decided to just go for it. “I feel like, maybe, you’re not okay. Sometimes.”
