Page 53 of Forbidden Obsession
“Shh, I know. I know. I’m glad you came to me. I wish I’d been able to wake for you.” She stops us walking and turns me to face her. “I wish I hadn’t fallen dormant when you were born. It will be my life’s greatest sadness. But we’re together now, and I would help mend the rift between you and your father if it’s in my power.”
Her words mean the world to me, but I can’t bring myself to tell her the damage has already been done. I don’t know I want to mend the rift with Father. Lately, we leave each other alone for the most part, and it’s the most peace I’ve ever had in the relationship. I’d prefer it to continue. Sure, it would be great if he were nicer, but that alone won’t mend the rift.
My mouth hangs open as my thoughts fly by, but I don’t know what to say.
She cups my cheek. “He wasn’t always like this, you know? He was good once. I don’t know what happened when I fell dormant, but it’s not your fault. I love you enough for both of us, and I’m so,soproud of you, my son.”
I might faint. My knees shiver and threaten to buckle. My lips quiver. A rush of warmth fills my chest, and tears form in my eyes. To know she’s proud means so much to me.
“Come here.” She folds her arms around my shoulders, protecting me from such big feelings.
I hug her waist. “I missed you so much. I never knew you, but I missed you with my whole heart.”
“Yes, I know what that feels like.” We rock together. “I missed you with my whole heart as well. I missed your first word, your first steps, and your every first since then. But you know what I do remember?”
“What’s that?”
“Your first kiss.”
“What?”
I lean back to look at her, at the teasing grin splitting her face and the light in her eyes. “You were so excited to tell me you’d finally kissed your Rahz. The joy bubbled out in your every word. Of all your visits, that’s perhaps the one I remember most vividly.”
Heat creeps across my cheeks. “It was a very good kiss.”
“A very good hour or two of kisses if what you said was true.”
Somehow I’m giggling and crying at once. Happy tears. “I can’t believe you remember that.”
“That was around the time you stopped fearing the Gatekeeper because nothing could harm you so long as you had Rahz. I was happy for you then.”
Those old childhood fears seem so silly now. “But I don’t know anything about you.”
“You have only to ask. For you, I’m an open book.”
There’s so much I want to know. So much I’ve always wanted to know. Perhaps the most burning questions are why Father? What did you ever see in him? But I’m not sure it’s time for that conversation, though it does feel good to know I can ask when I’m ready.
“We have the gift of time,” she says, probably to stop my thoughts from racing so much. “Time for me to sort out your father. To find out why he’s changed and to help him remember the man he used to be. Time to spend with you, my son, and make up for what we lost. Time to thank Bessa for everything she’s done for me. Foryou.Time to get to know your sweet, handsome Rahz.”
My breath catches in my throat. She doesn’t know he’s leaving.
And as hard as it will be to say good-bye to my mother so soon, I’m not sure I can let him leave without me.
Her eyes blaze. “Oh, dear. What is it? What’s wrong?”
I shake my head. If only I were better with words in the moment, but my tongue is always stubborn when I need it the most.
“Is it something I’ve said?” Her expression is so full of concern. The way Rahz looks at me sometimes when I’m upset. A look I’ve never received from my father.
“No, no, it’s not you. It’s Rahz. I have something to tell you. And Father as well.” No matter how much I dread the conversation.
“Shall I call to him?”
“You can do that?”
“He’s my mate. Of course I can.”
I blink, stunned. “Can Rahz and I do that?”
