Page 82 of Changeling
“I panicked. Screamed. Tried again, only to see the blaze intensify once more. Reality struck. There was no way my parents lived through that. If they weren’t dead before, I’d surely killed them now.
“The rest is a blur. I’d fallen to my knees. The people had seen what I’d done. They saw the fire react to my hands, the unnatural way in which it grew, and how I’d remained unharmed. They turned on me then, as they should have, a mob of onlookers shouting ‘witch’ and ‘get him.’
“I don’t remember making a decision. Just running. Running until I collapsed, miles from the fire. I knew I could never go back. That my parents were gone, and it was my fault.”
Dominus holds me still, his arms a comfort I don’t deserve. “Where did you go?”
“Back to town. Stupid, I know, but it was the only place I knew. Some part of me needed to see the wreckage. To dwell in it. Mostly I hid. Occasionally someone spotted me, and I ran for my life, but I had a lot of time to think while I hid. I wished I’d died with them. I wished I was brave enough to end it. Day by day, I learned to shove the entire trauma aside, pushing it back so far I could almost imagine the memory wasn’t real.
“I thought, well, if I’m going to continue living, I must learn to control this power so nothing like this will happen again. So when the next person needs help, I know how to give it. And that’s when the first vampire found me, a woman called Daphne who thought she was saving a witch.
“It wasn’t until I met her sire’s sire, Tethys, that I was recognized for what I was—a changeling. He’d known another in his time, and he’s a bit like Remigius himself. A vampire with magic, that is. He noticed the magic in me was different from his own, like mine is different from Remy’s.
“Tethys could see an old glamour on me, hiding my true form. He put two and two together and knew he had a faerie on his hands. That’s why they sent messengers to The Dozen. Because they’re known to house faeries. I could meet another.
“From there, you know the rest.” I sag against him. Exhausted but also relieved to have the entire monstrous tale out in the open.
We sit quietly, holding each other as the snow begins to fall, muffling the other forest sounds. The forest is still, like Dominus and I are the only two people in the world.
His warm baritone reverberates against my chest. “You know it’s not your fault, right?”
“It feels like it is.”
He plants a kiss on my crown. “You tried your best, and you couldn’t have known the outcome. Sometimes, when we try our best, we get wonderful results, and sometimes bad things happen anyway. Tonight you freed me from a curse. You’d have saved your parents if you could have. They know that. Blaming yourself is no way to honor them.”
Part of me knows he’s right about all this, but letting go of the blame would feel like getting off too easily. The other part of me insists that I should suffer because my parents did. “It’s like I can’t even think of them without sobbing, so I just don’t think of them at all.”
“That’s sad. And it’s not helping you. I think we could change that if we tried. What were their names?”
“Flora and Theo.” Oh, the swell of warmth to say their names aloud, to recall their faces to mind. How I’ve missed them. My mother and father. How I wish they could see me now. Well, maybe notright nowwith tear streaks down my face, but the real me. My wings. My ears. I wish I could tell them all of it.
“We should speak of them more often, Sebastian. I’d love to hear the stories from your childhood, the happy as well as the sad. Let me get to know your parents through you, and together we’ll honor their memory.”
That sounds…good. Nice. Why haven’t I been doing that all along? I do want to share the memories with Dominus. “Yes, yes. Let’s do that. And let’s also speak of your family, of whom I know nothing, but not now that I’m finally back under control.” I manage a little chuckle. “I don’t want to cry anymore tonight. No more talking. What is it you wanted to show me?”
“Are you up for more hiking? We’re almost there.”
I climb off his lap and take his hand. It’ll be good to move. “Lead on.”
CHAPTER25
Dominus
My poor,dear Sebastian. I knew he’d been through trauma. I knew he’d suffered great loss. But to hear the tale from his lips was heartbreaking.
I’m hopeful I have something that will cheer us both up. Together, we’ll face what comes much stronger than we ever could have alone.
Snow crunches beneath our boots, wets our lashes, and makes the vast countryside even more majestic. With woods bordering the right side of the road and farms to the left, it’s the best of both worlds; wilderness and tamed comfort to be had at once.
“I’ve been scouting the hills surrounding Pest since I wrote you that last letter. You’ll be pleased to know I found a family to trade with. The Twig’s scraps for fresh eggs and in the summer, fresh vegetables.”
“That’s fantastic.” Sebastian lights up next to me. Seeing a smile return to his face and knowing I’m the one who put it there fills me with joy. “Is that where we’re headed?”
“It’s not.” A shiver runs down my spine that has nothing to do with the cold. “What I have to show you is even better. And we’re nearly there.”
Around a bend in the road, the old farmhouse comes into view. A small building, just four rooms, but with a porch on all four sides. It sits on a plot of land no more than ten acres, half cleared and half wooded. A rickety, falling-down fence surrounds the open field before the house.
“This is what I came to show you.”
