Page 47 of The Substitute
“This is cute and all, but some of us have shit to do.” The chair slides on the floor, and I tense, waiting for a fight, but Savage stays relaxed.
“No one is stopping you, brother,” Savage replies.
There’s an angry huff behind me, and I roll onto my back to look up at my roommate. There’s something there besides irritation—just for a second, when his eyes meet mine.
I want to be relaxed like Savage, but I can’t help but feel like I’m hurting Ambrose, and things have only just started to be better in the room. I don’t want to ruin them again. Anxiety twists in my gut until I can’t take it anymore. “I should probably study, too.”
Ambrose looks up from his books with a smirk. He better not start some shit.
But Savage doesn’t take the bait. He kisses my temple and turns my face to his with fingers on my chin. “Text me later.”
Once I’ve walked Savage out and get back to my room, I find Ambrose shirtless and clearly still upset. I don’t know what to do about it or how to handle this. Do I wait for him to say somethingfirst? Do I apologize for something? Do we need to set up some kind of rule about having people here?
I scrub a hand over my face and drop down onto my bed.
“You’re not studying.”
I look up to find Ambrose watching me.
“What?”
“You’re not studying.”
Now I’m confused. Clearly, I’m not. I don’t have any of my shit out. “Huh?”
“You told him you need to study.”
“That was just to make it stop being awkward—” I cut myself off. I don’t know what I’m saying. I like spending time with Savage, but I also like how jealous Ambrose is being. I don’t want either of them to stop, but does that make me shitty? They both know. I hate feeling good then getting hit with all this guilt.
We stare at each other for a long moment before he lifts the blankets and climbs under, then holds them up.
“Come here.”
I get up and slide into his bed, already warm from his body heat, and wait for his next move.
Is he jealous I was cuddling with Savage so now he feels like he has to as well? Or is this what he really wants?
Ambrose turns me to face away from him and curls up against my back, wrapping his arm around my waist to flatten his palm on my chest. He bends one knee, pushing mine up as well, then leans into me. The pressure is perfect, and I let out a satisfied sigh. Ambrose kisses the back of my neck and settles, quickly falling asleep and taking me with him.
SEVENTEEN
SAVAGE
Ihate that I have to go home, but Ambrose gets to be there with him all night. The thought burrows its way into my brain over the next few days while I slog through practice and a game. There is no fucking way I can compete with him being there all the time.
I want to ask him to back off, but I know he won’t take that well. He’s mad at me, and I think he likes Tobi as much as I do. He probably thinks I’m just playing a game, since I don’t date, but somewhere between trying to piss Ambrose off and getting to know Tobi, things changed. I really like spending time with him.
“You’re distracted today,” Lovelace says halfway through practice.
“It’s been a long week. Busy between games, school, and finding time for interviews. This shit was so much easier when I wasn’t the starting goalie.”
“Well, you’re not fucking allowed to quit on us!”
“I didn’t say I was going to quit. Christ.” It hadn’t even crossed my mind. I couldn’t do that to the guys, even if I didn’t plan on playing past college.
We switch up to drills, and I get back in the goal while the guys work through them. It’s a pretty low-key part of practice while they work on out handling defenders. A couple of guys get shots off, but nothing I can’t defend, leaving me with lots of time in my head.
Why the fuck do I have to like the guy who’s my brother’s fucking roommate? This feels like a fucking mean joke from the universe. I don’t want to have to do this because I know it will hurt my mother in the end if I piss off Ambrose more, but I need to lock things in with Tobi. I want to actually date him, not keep messing around while fucking sharing him with Ambrose.
