Page 103 of The Substitute
He shrugs again, but it’s clear he’s thinking about the answer, which I appreciate. I’m so tired of being told it’s in my head, not a big deal, get over it. Not being brushed off is kind of cool. “If your hypothesis is that you’re a lot or too much, what are you using to define what a lot or too much is, and what are you using to decide a positive or negative response to it?”
I lift an eyebrow at him and blink. Does he really want me to dissect my insecurities like this?
“Well?” he asks when I don’t respond.
“I don’t know that I’ve ever picked it apart like a social experiment before—give me a second.”
He nods and waits like he has all the time in the world. He’s not rushing out of here, not hurrying me along so he can get to the next thing or telling me I’m being dramatic. It’s weird.
“Well, my parents prefer my brother to me?—”
“What is your evidence to support that fact?”
Maybe I don’t like having a guy who can use science against me. Is this how Teddy feels? I shudder because I do not want to empathize with Teddy.
“Uh, not in so many words, but it’s obvious.” My back tightens as I prepare for the battle I’m about to fight.
“How are you defining obvious?” Again, there’s no judgment, just curiosity. “Is this something you would use to back up your argument in a paper?”
I scoff, narrowing my eyes. “Because any time he walks into the room, they immediately turn toward him like he’s the damn sun and they’re sunflowers? They will stop mid-sentence or cut me off to talk to him, and they have my entire life. But they never do that to him.”
“Have you asked him? Maybe they do, and you don’t see it because you aren’t in the conversation.”
“I doubt he would even notice.”
“So if I’m understanding this correctly, you have no unbiased evidence to back this up?”
“How the hell would I have unbiased evidence of my own experience?” I demand, annoyed he’s making good points.
“By asking others around you?” he says, making me feel a little like an idiot even if he’s not trying to. “What about Rhys? He’s been your best friend forever, right?”
“He’s definitely not unbiased. His entire world is hockey and my brother. He fucking lights up when my brother enters the room.”
“But that’s a recent change. You never asked him about it before that?”
“No. The last thing I wanted to talk about was my brother.”
He sighs. “Okay, next parameter?”
I blink at him. “My complete lack of friends?”
“You have—had—a best friend.”
“He started fucking my brother behind my back. I think that supports my argument.”
“You can’t help who your heart wants.”
“It was not the heart that got them started.”
A smile tugs on Savage’s mouth. “The dick wants what the dick wants, and if both parties are consenting…”
“Could you be any more ridiculous?”
He shrugs. “I really could. Would you like me to try?”
“No!”
“I still don’t think that can be taken into consideration. I’m not attracted to your brother.”
