Page 95 of The King of Halloween
Raj clenched around Adam’s hand, holding it tight, but he still couldn’t face him.
“Just because I missed you. Because I liked being around you, being with you beyond...fucking in the electric chair.” He was losing his battle fast. “I’m not foolish enough to expect you to feel the same. Or anything.”
“Adam…”
“I don’t even know where you live. Which is fine. It’s normal. And fine. So fine.”
Cool fingertips glanced against his jaw. The hand started to pull him around. Rather than fight it, he tried to shake away the tears before Raj lost any lingering respect for him. As he pivoted to face the man guiding him, Adam nearly flopped onto the floor.
Rivers rained down Raj’s cheeks. He’d pulled his lips into a rictus as if about to scream. Wrapping his fingers around the back of Adam’s head, Raj closed his eyes tightly. A moan slipped out, and he confessed, “I live in a trailer.”
“In an RV? Is it at the park with the goose pond?”
“No. Not in an RV. It’s a trailer for hauling around equipment, junk. I parked it at the back of the hotel behind some trees, and I live there. Every night I sleep on a freezing cot under every coat I own—which aren’t enough. My back aches. I get a few hours at best. I can’t feel my toes when I wake up. It’s horrible.”
Adam slipped his arm around Raj’s shoulders as if to pat him on the back. His body jerked as Raj dove in, crushing his cheek to his chest. “It wasn’t supposed to be like this. They found water damage, so my down payment went to that. I thought to save some money with the temporary trailer. A week, at most. But money kept funneling down this black hole, and I didn’t know what to do.”
“It’s okay. Everyone has their lows. You’re going to be all right.”
“No. I’m not.” Raj yanked his head off of Adam’s chest. His eyes were red but laser-focused. “Because of my crippling fear of failure, I hurt you.” He cupped a hand to Adam’s cheek and began to plead. “I made you think you’re not special, or wonderful, or perfect.”
Air gulped down Adam’s throat. He clung to the back of Raj’s hand. “Raj.” Shuddering, Adam slipped closer, his forehead resting against Raj’s. “I like you, and…” His lips warped, fighting against what was in his heart and the fear of it breaking. “I want you…to sleep in my bed.”
“What?”
“Every night. I need you there on my soft mattress under the warm blankets. Breakfast every morning and a free wash.”
“Adam…”
“It’s selfish, I know, but…” Adam drew his thumb over Raj’s cheeks. “I don’t want to wake up without you by my side.”
Raj’s hand slipped off of Adam’s cheek and caressed down until curving over his chest above his heart. “I mean, if it’ll make you feel better.”
“Oh, it will. I get scared all alone in that moderately-sized house.”
“How can I say no?”
They kissed together. No one led the dance. Two men moved in sync for the first time. Lips parting, tongues meeting, heat spiraled from one mouth to the other, both of their hearts casting promises they could barely understand.
“Ahem.”
Adam pulled back, guilt on his face as he whipped around and shot to his feet. His pumpkin head greeted him. As he stared past it, he found Poppy holding out the old gourd. “Someone turned this in to the lost and found,” she said.
“Thank you. I did not need that tar and feathering.”
“I think the smashing contest is about to start soon, and they’re looking for their emcee.”
Right, his duties as king. Adam nodded his thanks and Poppy slipped away, but not before she cast a quick look at Raj. Adam tapped the head before remembering how fragile it was. “I should…”
“Go on. Your subjects await.” Raj said with a laugh.
“What about you?”
“I think I’m going to take a much-needed nap here. Then, how about dinner?”
Adam grinned madly. “There’s this diner I know that has the best blueberry pie.”
“Isn’t pumpkin more in season?” Raj asked with a jerk of his head to the gourd in Adam’s hands.
